All In A Day's Life...

TiT fOr TaT...

2007-04-29T13:44:00.000+08:00

I've got this from a friend through the mail... Pretty interesting read... Enjoy...

I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their heads and women with their hearts.

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out for a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said,"That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.

Well, guys may not just think with their small heads after all... =)

A fAiRy TaLe LiFe...

2007-04-22T13:03:00.000+08:00

I juz heard from my mum that my neighbour, a flight stewardess, is going to marry a pilot... Their love nest will be a condominium, which she will move in after their marriage... And her mother-in-law is an MP... I wonder who is it... Is it Dr. Amy Khor, or Dr. Lily Neo, or whoever...

Isn't it every girl's wish, to marry someone who can afford her all the luxuries of life, and bring her a notch (or even a few) higher in the 'caste' system? I'm sure many stewardess will dream to marry a successful pilot, juz like nurses, would want to marry a doctor...

So timothy, who will be the lucky 'mi-cee' (hokkien for nurse) in your life? =p

a PeRfEcT dAy...

2007-04-16T20:00:00.000+08:00

Hmm... A perfect day... wat makes up a perfect day for you? A good and bright start in the morning? Or a cool rainy weather which my bao bei favours... (can't understand why also...) Or when everything juz goes smoothly like the traffic lights turning green for you at every junction?? *wink*

I had my perfect day on Saturday... Thinking about it juz makes me all warm and fuzzy... *cuddles*

I woke up in the morning without the use of the alarm clock, with totally nothing to worry about... No stress up in the mind... Coz it's a weekend!!! Yes, it only comes after 5 HARD-working days... It feels great to wake up and tell yourself, it's a saturday... And I can drag myself to wash up without worrying about meeting the time to leave for work...

Next, i went out to get myself some brunch... Yes... B-r-u-n-c-h... Lovely 2 in 1 meals which you can enjoy when you wake up suitably late... This was followed by some groceries shopping at the supermarket... It could all have been better if i have bao bei with me, as it's our favourite place to shop...

Spending the rest of the lazy afternoon clearing my mailbox and doing some reading will be an ideal schedule, which i proudly did!! Though i wished i can go on forever, reading my materials, i have to meet bao bei for our wonderful dinner that i had planned...

I picked bao bei up before heading to this restaurant at cantonment road, called Mariners' Corner...

It's a restaurant decked in 'marine attire', as the name suggests, serving the regular western seafood, steaks and spaghettis... Although the restaurant is in a 'marine attire', dun expect the waitresses to be in hot leathery sailor suits, or even sailor moon uniforms... the staff are generally of mature uncles and aunties...

Upon entering, this nice uncle served us, telling us the soup of the day, and recommending us the scallops as appetisers... 'Do you wan to try our cheese-baked scallops for appetiser, very nice!!'

Just then, Class 95 was playing our song in the background...

"Everytime our eyes meet... this feeling inside me... is more than words could ever say..."

*Bao bei and i juz gaze at each other lovingly... =) *

Below is the wonderful line-up of our feast...

Soup of the day: Mushroom soup ($3), served with lightly toasted garlic bread... The butter spread's aroma was stronger than the garlic stench, leaving room for some breath-fresh kisses after the meal... =)

Buffalo wings ($5)... it's crispy fried like KFC's chicken, as bao bei says it...

Seafood platter, single serving ($15): Comprises of calamari, onion rings, mussels, fish and prawns, all breaded, served on a bed of fries... The tar-tar sauce is splendid!!

Kurau fish - fish and chips ($15), breaded fish and chips...

The food is generally good, with a nostalgic 80's taste and feel to it... The taste of the food juz brings back old memories for me as it has that 80's taste and aroma to it... Even the cutlery has brown or blue margin trimmings along the border... beautiful...... This place would have been even more perfect if it's set in my hometown sunset way... =)

After dinner, bao bei wanted some desserts... We agreed on ice-cream and off we went to another luxuriously romantic place... We drove down to the Guthrie House along sixth avenue for Venezia ice cream...

We had 2 flavours, durian and cookies & cream...

After that, we took a walk around Cold Storage before heading home to watch our 'Wu Zong Xian' show...

And wat purr-fect way to end the night than some rock and roll on the bed... =p

I love you bao bei... Thank you for the perfect day!! *kiss*

CiViL sErViCe PaY iNCrEaSe...

2007-04-14T14:57:00.000+08:00

This picture was taken from the Mr. Brown website, which he took from asiaone... See how happy they are... Well, who isn't, knowing that there will be a pay increase for them...

The hot news of this season undoubtedly belongs to the proposed/planned/decided pay increse which the government has announced in parliament recently...

The rationale: Have competitive pay to retain top talents to govern the country... In order to retain these top talents, the salaries will have to be measurable to the top talents in the private sector, so as not to have a talent drain like in the economy boom days back in the 90s... With that, the measurement is made on the top 8 earners in the private sector, or something like that...

Fine, you justify that you have to retain these talents to ensure that you have the best people in the government... And in so doing, you actually made a study of the top earners in the private sector, and pay your government competitively... But isn't the comparision a tad too skewed?

How many people, in the entire country, enjoys such luxurious pay? Probably juz the CEOs and the top bankers etc... And by comparing the salaries to these people of probably juz 0.1% in the entire country, how fair/skewed is your measurement?

Secondly, being a MP or minister is by choice, and is a public service... The term public service, means you volunteer your services in the name of helping the people of your country... The citizens look up to you... Since it is a public service, how can you justify with the FAT allowances and pay that you receive... And how logical is it that you actually compare your pay with the top 8 professionals in the private sector?

Thirdly, the civil servants' pay comes from the taxes of the people... With higher pay means more funds will have to be collected/set aside to make up for the money... Doesn't it mean more taxes will have to be collected/sacrificed for other better uses? So who, in the end, benefits/suffers? What with the upcoming GST hikes as well?

The future of the public services looks promising, but the citizens, bleak...

And lastly, the most venom question... If in order to retain top leaders in the government, you have to pay top dollars, then may i ask, how 'corrupted' is your government?

*Disclaimer: The above remarks/comments are juz my personal two cents worth...

mY nAmE iS...... bErT???

2007-02-18T00:17:00.000+08:00

Bao bei looked at me and said...

Bao bei: "I think you look like Bert..."

Me: "???"

You judge for yourselves...

This post is brought to you by the vowels: U, N, I... =)

2007-01-31T15:40:00.000+08:00

tHe EnD oF tHe CrAzY hOrSe...

2007-01-25T22:23:00.000+08:00

The Crazy Horse has decided to close its doors by the end of this month… One fewer hangout for the high class chi-ko-pehs...

I feel it's a sad news for us as we have lost another attraction... Even though it’s not a very ‘positive’ kind of attraction, having it in Singapore in the first place shows that we are one step closer to being a more open and receptive society... But sad to say, it didn't take off as expected... Is it due to the low sex drive of Singaporeans, who are infamously ranked as one of the lowest in the world in terms of frequency of bedroom activities?? Or are Singaporeans still not open to these entertainment? Unlikely for the second reason as the Neptune, which has cabaret dancing in their restaurant, was able to survive for many years until it closed 1 month ago due to further redevelopment... Likewise, entertainment like these still continue to do well somewhere in the middle east of Singapore.... *wink*

One of the more possible reasons for its poor turnout could be due to the high cost of their tickets… At $85 each, would you pay to watch a bunch of ang-moh hotties dancing around in sexually suggestive moves? If you’re into that kind of activity, isn’t it better to go to some other place instead of Clarke Quay for some other form of entertainment? With that, it not only restricts to satisfying your sense of sight and dirty mind, but also satisfies your sense of touch (groping), sight (to see and stare), smell (shampooed scented hair), hearing (all the moaning and groaning), taste (needless to say, lick…), and lastly, both your psychological and physiological needs???

Even though The Crazy Horse has lots of sex appeal, which is sure to sell, inevitably, it’s the crazy ticket price that killed The Crazy Horse…

a PoInT tO pOnDeR uPoN...

2007-01-24T22:15:00.000+08:00

I was buying my lunch last Saturday at a Muslim nasi lemak stall… (yes bao bei, M-u-s-l-i-m store…) Below was a shocking conversation I heard from the guy next to me…

Boy: (Pointing to a dish of chicken drumstick curry) Auntie, this chicken got bones not?

Auntie: Huhh?? (looking bewildered) Of coz got bones lah… (Mocking at him at the same time)

I turned around, kay-po to know who had to ask this wonderful question… The guy was wearing his school uniform, a blue t-shirt with his school’s name spread across his back…He was a JC student from the infamous school that produces the highest pregnancy rate…

Oh my gosh… this boy is either blind enough not to see that the chicken drumstick does, indeed, have the drumstick bone, or dunno how to eat his chicken if it’s not de-boned… If he feels that chicken curry should have chicken parts without bones, I will recommend him another dish instead… Chicken nugget curry……

This led me to think that, is today’s young too spoon-fed that all meat (chicken or fish) have to be de-boned before they know how to eat, or, they simply do not think before they open their mouth to speak?

While we’re in a rat race to be in the top school and to bring home a comfortable piece of bread and butter, we should probably take a backseat, and polish up on our own basic home-economics skills… Household chores like cooking and washing has become a dying ‘trade/knowledge’ among the youths as we are being too well-taken care of… It’s time we take more ownership of our own basic ‘survival’ skills, to be more independent… Of which, I’m also partly guilty for that… =)

Cheers!! May you have a Happy Chicken Curry Day!! (That’s if you understand my joke…) =)

tHe PrEcIoUs GeM ~ jAdE

2007-01-22T22:31:00.000+08:00

I heard this on Class 95 this morning......

Hosting as a DJ for Class 95: $15,000

Hosting as a show host for 'The Dance Floor': $20,000

Hosting 'The Dance Floor' with Jade Seah: Priceless......

Oh my... Jade is now the priceless gem... =)

oF cOlOuReD tIcKeTs...

2007-01-22T21:48:00.000+08:00

I hate it when people stick flyers/papers to my windscreen wipers… This is because:

1. I find it extremely rude when ‘strangers’ touch touch my vehicle without my permission, wat’s more, PULL my wiper and stick things without my consent…
2. Without my prior consent, sticking flyers ‘in my face’ is an act I call ‘force advertising’, which I’m not interested and I cannot tolerate
3. Usually, the wiper that has been stuck with the flyers will fail to work well after that incident, leaving traces of water on the windscreen even after repeated wipes… It will never be back to the brand new condition again… I’m actually quite ‘pan-tang’ (superstitious) with this… I will appreciate for my wipers to work well as I dun like my vision to be blurred on rainy days…

Now, wat I got on my wipers last Friday was not any other ordinary flyers or papers, but a damn green ticket!! A PARKING TICKET!!! And it was STUCK TO MY WIPER!!! DOUBLE AGONY!!! >:(

I was visiting my customer, a mama shop at the void deck… I parked my vehicle in the white lot that was directly facing the mama shop… As I left in a hurry, I had carelessly forgotten to put some valid coupon…(it’s true) By then, the coupon on my dashboard was 1 and a half hour overdue…

I know it’s my mistake that I should have put a valid coupon before I left my vehicle… But, my vehicle, with the company’s logo so prominently stuck all over the vehicle, should have given enough clues that I could have been doing some deliveries, or loading and unloading… Why did the ma-cik have to summon me? Can’t she make some allowance and give way?!? Secondly, my vehicle was juz parked right in front of the mama shop… Wouldn’t she be afraid that I could anytime come chasing at her should she issue the ticket?? And thirdly, I really hate it when people stick things to my wiper!! And of all things, a green parking ticket!!! I wouldn’t have mind if it’s a golden ticket to Willy Wonker’s chocolate factory, which I will give it to bao bei… =) But no, it’s a green SUMMON!!!

I looked around to try to find the brainless ma-cik, whom would have been wearing the dull white long sleeve shirt and carried a navy blue umbrella… Luckily for her, she was nowhere to be seen from my sight… If not, she would have suffered some angry and evil stares from me!!!

With that, I’m $20 poorer, NO thanks to her…

cHaSiNg CaRs...

2007-01-10T22:49:00.000+08:00

(yes, i simply love that song...)

The elder brother has gone to Hang Zhou for 3 days, leaving his vios in my care... Haha!! So, i took bao bei out for a little spin around town, to raffles city-citylink mall...

This is actually my first drive in his vios... Therefore, i was a little scaredly-cat and nervous... i wouldn't want to leave a scratch or damage his beloved due to any mishandling of mine... Upon getting in, i took some time to warm up to the surrondings, followed by some spins around the carpark to get used to the turning angle...

Ok... a little warm-up soothes the nerves... i'm ready for the real adventure... =) So, here we go, setting off for town...

The traffic was smooth, so was the car... it was easy to handle, gentle and responsive... Other than the occassional hazing, yet soft humming of the engine when i needed to ram the accelerator to pick up speed, all was smooth and gentle...

After 30mins, i was finally safe in the carpark... I got out of the car with a sigh of relief... *phew*

Went to new urban male to look for my havaianas sandals, but it was all out of stock for my size... =( And they have no idea when will the new shipment come in... i was wondering for how long more can my sandals hold on until it finally gives way...

I'm still a die-hard fan for this brand of sandals even though it comes with a slighty hefty price tag... it's not only durable, but it's also soft and comfy... i can juz wear with any bottoms and it goes really well...

(i kind of some a bit bimbo-tic in this entry... hmmmm...)

On the way back to bao bei's house, we had a good chat... Bao bei was all lovey today... i think she said 'i love you' for 293897 times throughout the 4 hours i was with her...

For the 293898th time, I LOVE YOU too bao bei... *kiss*

a ChAnCeD eNcOuNtEr 2...

2007-01-09T19:30:00.000+08:00

Yes, i met the CEO again... he's back from his year-end holidays from Brazil (i guess), his country of origin... I met him not at the toilet this time round, but at the lift lobby... I had just stepped out of the toilet, with my hands wet from washing after using the toilet (i'm hygienic)... As i walked towards the lift lobby and turned around the corner, i saw him...... Well, dead-end with no where to escape, i gave him a warm smile and greeted good morning...

He greeted me with his warm nature again and stretched out his hand for a handshake... Taken aback by surprise and embarrassed at the same time as my hands were wet, i quickly wiped my hands on my pants and apologised to him that my hands were wet, before returning the handshake from his big firm palm...

We had some small talk as we entered the lift...

"How are you", he asked.

"I'm good, thank you... I've been busy trying to meet the target for last month..."

"That's good, keep it up!!"

The lift door opened and i bade him goodbye... Phew... wat a string of events and emotions within a few seconds... It's always a nervous thing to talk to someone who is that BIG!!

pLeAsAnT mOrNiNg SuRpRiSe...

2007-01-09T19:10:00.000+08:00

During our daily sales meeting this morning, one lady barged in to make an announcement... She raised her voice, trying to get her message across the noisy room:

"There's a Toyota roadshow outside, those who are interested can go and visit later..."

"Toyota roadshow?? How come they come here to sell cars??" That was my reaction when i first heard of it... All was soon forgotten as i got back to fill in the endless paperwork...

After my meeting, as i walked out of the room, i was taken aback by wat i saw... A bevy line of toyota cars were lined up at the porch, like how cars for VIPs will always be found at the car porches... The range included the picnic, altis and vios, each with their blue test-drive licence plates, all ready to go... How exciting!! =)

So is the company going to change all our vans into toyota cars for us? I dun need a picnic or rav 4, all i ask for is an altis or vios... (heh heh) If not, why would they wan to do a roadshow here? The majority of our company force is not able to afford cars... Obviously, they're targeting the wrong customer base... Even if they're after the executives, there's only a small number and wat's the likelihood of them signing on the dotted line while at work? *piang head*

I believe you and i can gauge their sales figure for today...

a CoZy WeEkEnD...

2007-01-05T19:49:00.000+08:00

Last saturday, I got bao bei to come over for a movie marathon and pizza for dinner... The moment we got home, we found that we were all to ourselves... Wat happened next needs no further description...... *wink*

Not too long after i finished showering, the pizza man came... Wat perfect timing!! After a nice warm shower, when the physiological and 'psychological' needs were fulfilled, it's time to fulfil the stomacho-logical needs now... Below is our order...

1. 10" Turkey-turkey, which consists of Turkey Ham, Turkey Bacon, Turkey Sausage, Capsicum, Fresh Tomatoes & 4 Cheeses

2. 10" Singapura Special, which consists of Spicy Chicken, Garlic, Capsicum, Red Chilli

3. Jumbo chicken wings, which we feel does not live up to its name...

Doesn't this pic seems very advertisement like?? Any chances of a lifetime sponsorship of pizzas if we submit this pic to Canadian Pizza?? =p

After some dry food, bao bei craved for some soup which i was reluctantly lazy to cook for her... She volunteered to cook for us, but on a condition...... that i have to wash the dishes later... DEAL!!!

One more addition to the menu: Cream of mushroom with roasted garlic...

The soup was wonderful... the aroma and taste was juz splendid!! bao bei juz have to claim some credit for the soup when she says: "you must see who cook wan..." =)

bao bei and her pizza moment...

The pizza was juz too much for us 2 little folks to finish... I combined the 2 pizzas into 1 box for easier storage, and it became...

Turkey meets Singupura!!

Our verdict after the meal: the pizzas were not wonderful, but juz very average... The chicken wings were very much slimmed-down and not appealing in taste too... The only console was bao bei's soup... =)

The average dinner did not spoil our nite though... The movie marathon was supposed to start when events fall by themselves again... It was a cozy and lovey-dovey nite... I love these kind of weekends!! =)

One tip though: it's really uncomfortable to get it on with a full stomach... *wink*

bRaNd NeW yEaR!!!

2007-01-01T23:44:00.000+08:00

Happy New Year 2007!! =)

It's all things first... Today's the first day of year 2007, the first day of the first month, the first day of the first week (monday), and this is the first entry of the year!!

Time flies when one's busy... December 2006 has been a busy and stressful one as my team and i were trying to catch up with our sales target... We even have to work on 2 saturdays in a row, both eves of eves of festive seasons, 23rd and 30th, when most people are already enjoying their long festive weekends... Thus, when it's around the corner for the year to end, i didn't feel anything at all... No sadness for the last days of 2006, nor excitement for the new year... it juz feels like any other day... =S

So it's a new year, a new beginning, and a time for new year resolutions...

While we were driving to town for some shopping, bao bei asked me: "So, wat's your new year resolution?"

*Stunned for words for a little while, but i managed to dig the answer out from the back of my head... i had earlier thought about it a few days ago when bao bei was away*

my answer: "to love you (bao bei) more and to treat you nicer..."

*silence*

i think bao bei had juz melted even though the sun wasn't shining very strongly into the vehicle...

then came her reply: "my new year resolution is to focus and study hard to get good grades... i should not plainly say i want to get HD (high distinction), but to really focus and get down to attaining it..." (not the exact words, but the meaning is there...)

I'm proud that bao bei is committed to do well, and i wish her all the best to attaining all the grades that she yearn for... =)

As for me, not only do i want to treat bao bei nicer, and to love her more, below are the list of things that i want to do, but are secondary to the above:

1. To save up at least $*** every month
2. To go for a private holiday with bao bei... Currently, i'm thinking of Redang island in June, and KL come year end...

The list is certainly not exhaustive, but these are wat i wan to concentrate on for the time being...

Happy New Year 2007!!! May happiness and good health be with you!!! =)

mY cHrIsTmAs PrEsEnTs...

2006-12-27T21:24:00.000+08:00

Wat a fruitful, bountiful, and wonderful Christmas 2006!!! Eve of Christmas eve was spent at bao bei's house with her relatives, sharing the christmas feast... On Christmas eve itself, we went to bao bei's uncle's house for a christmas dinner with her auntie theresa's extended family... wat a wierd combination it was... but who cares when the food juz got better!!! the house was decorated with christmas decorations, and the dinner table and cutlery were all nicely decorated ala ikea style... the food was juz splendid!!! Very western-like baked potatoes, baguette with cheese, turkey, smoked salmon, sushi, and a nice home-made blueberry cheesecake... Ma~ma~mia~ I love the layout of the house, the furniture and the decorations... it's very ikea style...

On Christmas evening, robin and daniel came over to bao bei's house for a steamboat dinner... Wonderful spread and grocery shopping earlier on at Giant IMM... We rented 'the devil wears prada' from videoezy as well... the show's kind of like project runway, with wierd fashion costumes in a bitchy and stressful political environment where everyone juz worships the ultimate diva... Anyway, will show you guys when the photos are ready... =)

See what bao bei has bought me for Christmas presents... (note: it's presents)

1. A sexy pair of Calvin Klein hip brief worth about $35... *kinky* =p

2. New pillow case for my new extra-large pillow from ikea... the pillow cases were from human touch, with a pair of wordings 'naughty' and 'nice'...

3. A box of cadbury chocolates with a vintage design which i had earlier told bao bei that i like...

4. A fun decoration written as ' i'm never rong' (yeah right)

5. And of course, a well-drawn with lots-of-love-put-in card specially for me... heehee...

close up of the front face...

and wat's inside... hmmm... she's so sweet... =)

I love the card... it's so sweet and she drew really well in it... she must have put in a lot of effort... my sweet little bao bei...

Apparently, bao bei went to buy the Calvin Klein briefs with robin... And robin has this to say to me...

"You must wear it and show her okay? And if it's not big enough, you have to stuff cotton wool in it to make it look big, like how the models from Victoria's Secrets do it..."

My dear robin... all i have to say is this...

- Firstly, i'm pretty sure mine is big enough that the crotch area will look firm when i wear it... thank you for your thought... =)

- Secondly, the size does matter, but the ability to perform matters as much too... there's no point stuffing in cotton wool to make it look bigger but at the end of the day, it's juz... ahem... you know....... soft and can't last...... Mine is not a white elephant nor white bird, but a strong boy who is built to perform and last!!!

Dun be offended robin... i noe you're juz kidding... so am i... but i'm not kidding about the size part... it's true!!! =p

Anyway, those were great christmas presents dear... and i do love the Calvin Kleins... I must say things juz spice up a notch higher and i can hardly wait for the bedroom fashion show that we so look forward to!!! *wink*

Merry Christmas to all!!! Ho Ho Ho!!!

i CaN('t) SuRvIvE...

2006-12-27T19:52:00.000+08:00

I thought i can survive. It's juz for about 48 plus hours... but i was wrong...... And it's only about 36 hours and counting now......

Bao bei has gone to KL with her family for a short holiday... It's a really short holiday of only 3 days 2 nites, but i'm missing her already... =(

Bao bei woke me up yesterday morning, but i couldn't talk much to her as i have to wash up for work... After i left house, i called her juz to hear her sweet voice 1 last time for the day, and to bid her goodbye for her trip...

Bao bei and family took a coach from golden mile to KL, which her coach will bypass my office for tuas checkpoint... Bao bei called me juz a few seconds before her double decker coach passes by my office... As i looked up from my daily pile of paperwork, i saw her coach zooming by the main road outside my office... Along with it, my heart seem to call out: "take me along too!!"

Bao bei said my office (which can be seen from the road) looks grand and exciting... thank you for your compliment dear!! *kiss*

Before bao bei left, she said she will call me during the nites she was there... but she didn't on the first nite... Instead we sent each other about 3 smses... it has now been about 36 hours since i last heard her voice... why am i so love sick this time around??

*and Class 95 is playing a beautiful song right now... wat perfect timing*

Heaven (Candlelight Mix) by DJ Sammy & Yanou

Oh, thinking about our younger years
There was only you and me
We were young and wild and free
Now, nothing can take you away from me
We've been down that road before
But, that's over now
You keep me coming back for more

Chorus
Baby, you're all that I want
When you're lying here in my arms
I'm finding it hard to believe
We're in Heaven
And love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in Heaven

Oh, once in your life you find someone
He will turn your world around
Pick you up when you're feeling down
Now nothing can change what you mean to me
There's a lot that I can sayBut, just hold me now'
Cause our love will light the way

Baby, you're all that I want
When you're lying here in my arms
I'm finding it hard to believe
We're in Heaven
And love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in Heaven

I've been waiting for someone
Someday(Something?) to arrive
Love to come along
Now our dreams are coming true
Through the good times and the bad
I'll be standing there by you

Baby, you're all that I want
When you're lying here in my arms
I'm finding it hard to believe
We're in Heaven
And love is all that I need
And I found it there in your heart
It isn't too hard to see
We're in Heaven

Perhaps these two sayings are right... 1. Absence makes the heart grows fonder... and 2. You will only cherish it when it's gone... Fortunately, bao bei will only be gone for a very very short while... I have since made myself promise that i will not take her for granted anymore, and will cherish her very well, holding her tight to my side and never letting go... i will also respect her opinions more, which the egoistic me bluntly fails to do...

During the smses last nite, i asked bao bei to buy me condoms on her way back, which she replied: "why must buy from malaysia when you can get it from singapore?" hmmmm... my dear, my answer is it makes it all the more kinkier and fun, you twit-head!! =p

Anyway, i've been a good boy for the past few days... So bao bei, will you reward me by unleashing the animal instinct in me when you're back?? *wink*

I love you bao bei... *kiss*

2 hOt Cs...

2006-12-09T00:05:00.000+08:00

I was parking my vehicle at one of the carparks at the bukit batok area when i spotted something that i could never have expected...

A hot chick, dressed with a bikini under a white (thin) tank top and short pink shorts was washing her black subaru impreza sports wagon... The scene was something that i never thought could have happened in our small little dull island... it seems like it was out of somewhere in a charlie's angels film, or somewhere at the beach carpark, but never at a HDB open space carpark... It was such a hot-babe-watching scenario that i have the right song ringing in my head...

*...don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me..... don't cha......*

the subaru impreza sports wagon... sample picture only, hot chick sold seperately...

The girl is hot, so is the black and sleek subaru... Double whammy!! And i bet she is hot too, from all the washing and wiping...

Let's pose this question to the guys, if there's any that's reading my blog...

"If you can only choose 1, would you choose to have:

a) the hot chick, or

b) the black and sleek subaru impreza sports wagon?"

I bet lots of guys will ask for option c: "can i have both?" *you greedy ass*

Anyway, i'm attached... So see, no touch... And no asking of name and numbers...

oF cOkE & mEnToS

2006-12-08T22:48:00.000+08:00

It has been reported recently that a 4 year old girl in Brazil had died due to a deadly mixture of consuming mentos and coke at the same time... The reaction of the two substance caused her mouth to explode and die...

True or false??

The answer: It's a false rumour!! The story is a half-true, and GREATLY exaggerated...

You might have seen the video of a 'stuntman' pouring a whole tube of mentos into a big bottle of coke, and the immediate effect was a huge fountain of gassy foam gushing out from the bottle... This lead you to believe that having mentos with coke will cause a hugh gassy eruption in your mouth/body, causing you grevious hurt... All these are just bad chain emails and rumours that are greatly exaggerated...

the foam explosion stunt...

The real explaination to the stunt is that the sugar coating on the mentos reacts with the carbon dioxide gas in the coke... Only when this sugar coating reacts with the carbon dioxide will this 'stunt' happen... When all these reactions happen, gas is released, which pushes all of the liquid up and out of the bottle into an incredible foam blast... If we were to put the mentos in our mouth, our saliva would have broken down the sugar coating... By drinking coke at the same time, there wouldn't be much reaction to speak of... Besides, if you wan the 'explosion' to occur in your mouth, you'd first need to have a mouth that can contain the hugh amount of coke (roughly 1.5 litres) and a whole tube of mentos...

Another reason why the 'stunt' is so believable is because most of the carbon dioxide stays in the liquid (coke) that has been pumped into it during the bottling process... During the stunt, when the coke bottle is opened, the mentos is immediately dropped into the bottle, leaving the unescaped, almost full composition of carbon dioxide to react with 1 full tube of mentos, causing a hugh eruption... However, during normal consumption, after we opened the bottle of coke to consume it, some of the carbon dioxide will escape into the air... therefore, it is very safe to drink coke with mentos in your mouth as the remaining carbon dioxide is not enough to react hardly with juz 1 or 2 pieces of mentos, which would have pre-broken down by the saliva in your mouth...

There you go, the scientific explanation... Moral of the story: Never fully believe what is reported in the new media as it could be a rumour... Do some logical thinking and research before you make your final judgement...

tHeIr FiRsT tImE...

2006-12-07T22:18:00.000+08:00

A girl asked her boyfriend to come over one Friday night to have dinner with her parents. Since this is such a big event, the girl announced to her boyfriend that after dinner, she would like to make love for the first time.

The boy was ecstatic, but he has never had sex before, so he took a trip to the pharmacist to get some condoms. The pharmacist helped the boy for about an hour. He told the boy everything there was to know about condoms and sex. At the register, the pharmacist asked the boy how many condoms he'd like to buy, a 3-pack, 10-pack, or family pack. The boy insisted on the family pack because he thought he would be rather busy, it being his first time and all.

That night, the boy showed up at the girl's parents' house and met his girlfriend at the door. "Oh, I'm so excited for you to meet my parents! Come on in!!"

The boy stepped inside and was taken to the dinner table where the girl's parents were seated. The boy quickly offered to say grace and bowed his head.

A minute passed, and the boy is still deep in prayer, with his head down.

10 minutes passed, and still no movement from the boy.

Finally, after 20 minutes with his head down, the girlfriend leaned over and whispers to the boyfriend, "I had no idea you were this religious."

The boy turned, and whispered back, "I had no idea your father was a pharmacist."

*haha*

oPaH lEaF hOkKiEn MeE...

2006-12-04T22:12:00.000+08:00

Mum is off to chalet today, so it's me again as the delivery boy to tah-pow food... it's juz me and my voluntary nature... Coz if i'm the one who buys the food, i'll get to choose wat i wan to eat... heehee... *scheming*

I was at ayer rajah hawker centre early this evening to 'lim kopi' with my colleagues as we had finished work early... When time is up and we are officially knocked off, we bade goodbye and went on our own ways... I ventured around the hawker centre to scout for dinner, but in my heart, i already know wat i had wanted...... fried hokkien mee!!!

This wonderful stall serves hokkien mee in the traditional opah leaves... For the younger generation *ahem*, opah leaves are used to wrap tah-pow food in the olden days... As technology improves, people do away with the leaves and use paper packaging instead... However, the impression still lingers... this explains why your chicken rice and char kway teow is wrapped in the brown paper that you see at hawker centres...

The treasure within the opah leaf: hokkien mee...

There are a few reasons why opah leaves are used to wrap food... it is said that food wrapped in opah leaves are more fragrant, as the leaves retain the aroma and heat, and together with the natural fragrance of the leaves, it's an ultimate combo!!! Opah leaves are also hardy to keep the food and gravy intact to be safely transported home...

This stall serves hokkien mee in servings of $3 and $5... I ordered the $3 wan and it's a generous big pack... The ingredients are fresh and tender, and the prawn stock is well absorbed by the soft noodles, giving you oomph in every bite... Simply deli-cious!!

the good ol' 70s...

For $3, you get 3 pieces of prawns, some sotongs, thick prawn stocked noodles, and wonderful fragrant chilli which i must add... Definitely worth every cent of it!!! Good buy, must try!!!

A cHaNcEd EnCoUnTeR...

2006-11-24T22:51:00.000+08:00

One amazing thing about males is that we can pee while in a standing position... As such, urinals are common in the gents... In some toilets, urinals are placed so close to one another that it is uncomfortable to 'occupy' the immediate urinal if someone is using it... It thus became a natural male instinct that all alternate urinals will first be occupied, if given a choice, before the ' unoccupied gaps' in between are being filled up...

There are many gents in my office, each being a small one... There are only 2 urinals in each gents due to the small space... Therefore, upon entering, you either have to choose the left, or the right urinal to answer the call of nature...

On one fateful day, while i was happily relieving my full bladder, with one hand holding on to my *censored* and the other on my pants, my CEO came to join in... The CEO of my company is an ang-moh from brazil... He greeted me with a warm 'hello' and occupied the next urinal...

This was one of the rare occassions that i get to see him and yet i have to meet him in the toilet... Wat a wierd place to meet for the first time... and an uncomfortable encounter at it... peeing right next to each other...

Now, dun ever ask me wat's the size of his buddy since he's an ang moh... (i can see you're all eager to noe...) I did not look down at his buddy and ask, "hey, how's everything down there?" all i ever noe and did was to quickly finish my business and get out of that awkward situation...

On hindsight, i can now proudly claim: you may have held a conversation with the CEO before, or have had a meal with him before... but how many of you have ever pee-ed with the CEO?? haha... i win hands down!! =)

wHeRe Am I?

2006-11-23T22:58:00.000+08:00

Got this from the november's issue of Maxim... Enjoy... =)

Two tourists are driving through Wisconsin in the US... As they are approaching Oconomowor, they start arguing about the pronunciation of the town's name... They argue back and forth until they stop for lunch...

As they stand at the counter, one tourist asks the blonde employee: "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are... very slowly?"

The blonde girl leans over the counter and says, "Burrrrr, gerrrrr, Kiiiiing..."

*haha*

pLeAsE mAkE uP mY rOoM...

2006-09-06T14:51:00.000+08:00

This door sign was seen on a door knob of a hotel room in a particular country club in Singapore...

please make up room ~ quirky...

Imagine the pleasant surprise, when you open the door one day to find eyeliner on the door frame, thick white foundation on the bed sheets with pink blusher on the pillow case... to top it all off, rosy red lipstick words were written on the miror, saying "i know what you did last summer..." freaky...

wHeN a WoMaN lOvEs A mAn...

2006-09-04T16:38:00.000+08:00

Bao bei bought me a pillow case quite some time back, with the following words on it:

"When a woman loves a man, she brings him joy beyond words"

Yes... this phrase is definitely true... when 2 people are in love, no words can describe how much joy it brings... it is even more wonderful to noe that the person you love loves you head over heels too...

The phrase also correctly describes the naughtier/kinkier side of love life... *wink*

So, this pillow is placed next to my sleeping pillow (the one that i use every nite), to remind me of bao bei's love for me, and also to be the first and last object that i see every morning and nite...

bao bei and i are having lots of fun these days... we juz had a wonderful weekend yesterday, going shopping and having some good tim sum, followed by heading home to watch tv on my bed... being with bao bei is such a blissful thing... there's always pleasant unexpected events to look forward to... and the silly and lovey things that we will do/say to each other...

Bao bei loves to buy me chocolote and snacks... recently, she juz bought me a box of 'hello panda' biscuits...

This is quite similar to the green and white koala biscuits that i used to have when i was young... that was my favourite snack back in those days... i'm looking forward to opening this box of biscuits, to discover the 'treasure' and pleasure of eating chocolate biscuits with bao bei... but i shall wait until when bao bei is here...

hOmE cOoKeD fOoD...

2006-09-01T11:47:00.000+08:00

*after a warm afternoon shower*

Me: Bao bei, i'm hungry...
Bao Bei: wat do you wan to eat? I'll cook for you...
Me: Shall we have campbell soup?? I feel like eating mee goreng also leh...

In a few minutes time, bao bei was standing at the stove and whipping up a home cooked meal for me... heehee... i'm so xing fu...

stir, stir, for a thick broth...

that's my noodles in the pot... doesn't my bao bei look delicious in this pic?? noodles or bao bei more delicious?? bao bei wins hands down!!

New England clam chowder... the campbell select's tastes better...

my 'kosong' mee goreng... minus the prawn and lime as shown on the packaging... the indo-mee brand tastes better too...

Let me get this clear... it is the brand of food that causes them to taste not as delicious, not my bao bei's cooking craft... But nonetheless, i really enjoyed this little home-cooked meal...

So, to reward bao bei for her lovely sweet efforts, i gave her a hug, kiss, and............

i'm so xing fu... =)

hApPy BiRtHdAy DaDdY!!!

2006-08-31T23:10:00.000+08:00

Today is my dad's birthday... Poor him has got to work on his birthday... Nonetheless, i've bought him a cake from four leaves... it's called Almond Fruit Tops... It's a vanilla sponge cake layered with fresh cream and peach slices, topped with strawberries and kiwi, and finally sprinkled with bits of almond nuts... Enjoy with a toast!! =)

a ReMaRkAbLe LaDy...

2006-08-30T18:48:00.000+08:00

The company that i'm going to work for has an in-house medical clinic... (how cool is that?) Apparently, the procedures for the new employees were to do a medical check up for referencing... So, i headed to the clinic to start the procedures...

Upon stepping into the clinic, i had a rough impression of the place... The clinic is generally painted with a white coat of paint and lighted with white flourescent lamps... the furnitures and posters were old, but still in a usable and tidy condition... The whole environment juz eludes a feeling of you being in a British clinic, western but old... The clinic is manned by a male nurse, who's into his late fifties and sixties... (i later found out from the doctor that his name is john...)He gave me the impression that he's educated and retired (he speaks english...), and the job is juz to keep his mind active and to kill time, as the clinic is only opened in the morning... The radio is tuned to Gold 90.5FM, a station of his age group... While waiting for the doctor, it juz feels so comfortable and serene... Ol' John took my urine sample, height and weight, before asking me to sit and wait for the doctor... The clinic had about 6 patients waiting in line ahead of me...

The wordings imprinted on the door were written as "The doctor will be in attendance from 8.15am to 9am, Mon to Fri, and until the last patient is seen" So wat time does the clinic closes? The time is about 8.50am now, and the doctor is not here yet...

Juz then, a lady stepped into the clinic... She wore formal office attire, carried a handbag and briefcase, and gave everyone a warm smile... For the moment, i was wondering, "who is this warm lady that has so much charisma? She's pretty and carried herself very well... Must be someone high-ranking to gain everyone's respect..." She answered my question when she walked into the room labelled "Consultation..."

So i waited for my turn to 'visit' this pretty lady...

I sat on the chair next to her table and tried to steal glances at this remarkable lady... *heehee* Her complexion is soft and smooth, but freckcles can be seen on her cheeks... On hindsight, she looks like bao bei's auntie teresa, but a bit plumer... (juz a bit)

She went on to take my blood pressure and blood sample... We small-talked a little...

Doc: So, you juz finish your NS?
Me: Yup... About 2 weeks back...
Doc: Oh... so wat did you do in the army?
Me: I was from the armour vocation, 46 SAR...
Doc: From Sungei....???
Me: Yah, Sungei Gedong... You know about that place?
Doc: My husband is Bernard Tan (Ex Chief Armour Officer, the very top guy in armour vocation... He's a general and his office used to be located there... He's a very warm person as well and was well-liked by many...)
Me: Oh!!
Doc: Yah, so if you ask me whether i know about the place, i do know Sungei Gedong...

At that moment, i was thinking... His husband can easily fetch $20k per month, and with her income as well, i wonder wat kind of housing do they live in... Her dressing also shows that she is rich and classy... And she's such a warm and nice person... Wat a nice and sweet couple... =)

These are instances in life when after rubbing shoulders with people of these class and status, it juz makes you feel inspired...

yEs, I'm PeTtY... sO wHaT?!?

2006-08-30T18:35:00.001+08:00

Dear Diary,

Bao bei's sister has juz had a change of tutor due to some personal commitments... The previous tutor had to drop a heavy bomb and 'pang-sang' her at this time when prelims and PSLE are juz around the corner... So, at this crucial moment, everyone is anxious to find her a tutor as soon as possible... But in such a short time, how to find one? And a good and reliable one at it!!

Then, out of nowhere, the idea of engaging 'him' as her tutor popped out... (Dunno who's great idea...) *eyes rolling*

The 'him' refers to bao bei's ex... He's generally smart, but mischievious... I didn't have a very good impression of him after some unhappy events back during the schooling days, and until today, nothing much has since change my opinion... Honestly speaking, this 'impression' thing is juz a small part of it... The bigger picture is: since he's bao bei's ex, and he has since broken my bao bei's heart, i dun really like the idea of him going to her house every now and then to tutor her sister, and at the same time, able to give him a chance to step into the house, and probably see bao bei... Even though the main issue here is to tutor her sister, it seems like an opportunity for him to see her, which i cannot tolerate... =(

At the end of the day, when there seems to not be any other tutor to cross our path, he's therefore employed...

So, twice a week (i guess), he'll be at her place to tutor her sister...

With his presence, things can get a little uncomfortable...
1. Bao bei's parents should noe that he's the ex... (i repeat: EX) So it may get a little awkward...
2. I wonder how comfortable her sister is with a guy tutor... (i'm juz trying to find reasons to argue...)
3. Bao bei will have to dress a little nicer to be presentable at least... And that includes *ahem*
4. Wat will they say to each other if they were to meet?
5. I surely wouldn't want to bump into him if i were to be at her place...

And today, while i was talking to bao bei on the phone, i realise that he's there... And bao bei is juz sitting across him, surfing her net, seperated by a see-through sliding door... (i do not like the idea of him able to steal glances at her easily... it's over!!)

I've told bao bei that i'm not happy with the idea, but she feels that i'm juz being whiny and not too serious about it... Yes, i may not be too serious, and juz wants to sound whiny, but i just do not like him and the idea of him being so proximately close to the family...

Worst still... I had the opportunity to hear his voice in the background over the phone!! Eewww!!!

So will he be here for long? Or will he be here juz through this year?

Dear Diary, wat should i do? Am i being whiny??

pLuTo Is OuT...

2006-08-25T16:36:00.000+08:00

The news reported that Pluto, known as the ninth and smallest planet of the Solar System since its discovery in 1930, has been taken off from the list of planets... It was stripped of its planetary status by the International Astronomical Union at their Prague meeting as its orbit overlaps with Neptune's. (Chim huh?? I also dun understand...)

Pluto's brown color is thought dominated by frozen methane deposits metamorphosed by faint but energetic sunlight. The dark band below Pluto's equator is seen to have rather complex coloring, however, indicating that some unknown mechanisms may have affected Pluto's surface.

Pluto's size in comparison with Earth

Therefore, the Solar System now only comprises of 8 planets, namely; Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus and Neptune...

With Pluto dropped from the Solar System, will the other pluto, Mickey's dog, be gone from Disney's characters as well?

Oh... How i miss those silly Disney cartoons... I can still remember how excited i was when watching the characters chasing about with things falling here and there... phew... bao bei... i do have a bit of childhood... =)

cOnDoMs NoT aLLoWeD iN sChOoL... (of course...)

2006-08-24T16:43:00.000+08:00

I saw this interesting topic in The Straits Times, regarding a thread made by a stomper in the STOMP website...

"Condoms Not Allowed In School"

With the ever correct notion of 'sex sells', and a little bit of kaypo-ness, i went to the website to 'check it out'... Below is an excerpt of the well-written complaint/feedback (i think he's a smart student considering he's only a secondary student and can write so well):

"Recently, a packet of condoms was found lying on the floor of my classroom. My teacher who picked it up from the floor became furious and started reprimanding the whole class. The owner of the packet of condoms was asked to own up. And, you'd even be surprised to hear that the school discipline master was called up to give us a lecture - apparently, we were told by him that condoms are not allowed in schools."

The complainant was not happy that the school came up with this 'no comdom' rule, which he strongly feels it's stupid and discourage safe sex especially among the young, who now ever readily engages in it... *damn it* This has add on to the other silly rules that students have highlighted in the media recently, which include the accepted and proper hairstyles to be adopted by students...

I feel that the school only manage to solve half the problem by lecturing the class, instead of using the opportunity to teach the students, an impromptu session of sex education which i believe the students will not mind having more... By banning condoms in school, it doesn't get the message across for students not to engage in sex... If the students wants to 'a-hem', and they want some 'protection', they can always get them from the neighbouring shops, convenience shops (is that why they call it convenience?) or even worse, have unprotected sex... The school should explain to them that they strongly do not encourage sexual activities at this age, and therefore view it as a bad thing for students to possess condoms, especially in the school compound where it should be a place of learning... The students should concentrate in class instead of thinking where to go after school for their sex rampant, or wat kind of positions they should adopt later... No doubt the school cannot stop the students from their raging sexual lifestyle, should they still want to have sex, then this will be the time for the condoms to come in... But even so, they should not bring these items to school, as the school is a place for learning...

Another interesting thing that i wan to highlight is; why did the student bring comdoms to school? the writer said in a later entry that his school is a boys-school...

Did the student intend to have some boy-on-boy action during recess time/after school in a dark corner of the school?
Or is it that the student is going to meet his girlfriend after school and IMMEDIATELY go and have some fun? (Can't wait...)
Or could it be that he juz wans to show off to his friends that he has condoms... Ego problem...
Or did they intend to fill it up with water, and use their pens as darts for some games? As what some stompers related their experience in their entries...

As i scrolled down further to read the other stompers' comments, i saw bao bei's comments on the issue...

"i think why it is said to be banned from sch is because they think that by banning it, students will not engage in the activity itself-which is of course very naive. On the other hand, maybe the teacher didn't noe how to react to a packet of condoms lying in the classroom so she reacted by reprimanding the class. Den again...if she didn't make such a big fuss over it...the students might have interpreted as...it's ok to carry condoms...and it's ok to engage in sex...u noe..."

What bao bei said is true also... Maybe the teacher did not know how to react to such situations as these things obviously dun always happen, and it is still a taboo subject in the asian culture...

(I realised that bao bei is getting more mature and analytical in her thinking these days...)

Talking about condoms, juz allow me to side track a little... I went to the durex website (u dun tell me u dunno wat is durex...) to look for picture(s) to add to this entry... And i was glorified by the new products that they have... interesting fellows... great 'research and development' from you guys... i'm lovin' it!!!

NEW Durex Pleasuremax condoms have a uniquely positioned raised rib and dot texture designed to maximise stimulation for you and your partner. This design, combined with an easy-on shape, ensures that both of you enjoy ultimate pleasure and intensity.

Durex easy-on condoms are now shaped to be easier to put on and to provide a better fit and feel during lovemaking. Transparent, ribbed and raised dotted texture, shaped, teat-ended, natural rubber latex condoms with a non-spermicidal lubricant

*This one has raised rib and dotted texture... and the description makes it sounds so deliciously easy to put on... heehee... juz launched in jun 2006*

NEW Durex Tingle condoms are coated in a special lubricant to create a gentle tingling sensation, heightening stimulation for both partners. Non-spermicidal mint flavoured lubricant. *woo-hoo*

and lastly...

Ultra-fine condoms that offer greater sensitivity. They are straight shaft shaped and transparent

*no more worries about not able to feel the real thing*

Okay, calm down and keep your d**ks in control... here are juz some pictures to add to the fun of reading a blog... no perverted intentions intended...

Hint: bao bei... how? *lustful wink*

sO wHeRe ThE bLoOdY hEll ArE yOu?

2006-08-22T15:50:00.000+08:00

You would probably have seen the Australia's tourism ad, or have heard the many comments, both positive and negative about the ending line or the concept... Below is the ad broken down into their scenes and dialogues that i've gotten from a website... (oops... i forgot to take down the address... no intention to plagiarize...)

The ad begin with a punter in a remote outback pub standing at the bar and says, “We’ve poured you a beer” and turns to face the smiling female bartender.

A camel trail is silhouetted by the Australian sunset. A woman says, “And we’ve had the camels shampooed”. The traditional Aboriginal percussion and didgeridoo is playing in the background, with the camels walking down the beach, sun setting in the background.

Bare legs swish through the surf. A woman in bikini top tells us, “We’ve saved you a spot on the beach”.

A boy with white zinc sunscreen on his face dives into the pool and emerges to say, “And we’ve got the sharks out of the pool”. Surf surges up the edges of the sea-side pool, saturating the swimmers.

Kangaroos watch as sand flares up from the golf course bunker. A golfer says, “We’ve got the roos off the green”. The kangaroos hop off.

The camera zooms up to the front steps of a homestead. A jackaroo tells us, “And Bill’s on his way down to open the front gate”. Bill is driving a ute down a long red dust road.

A yellow sea plane lands in the Great Barrier Reef. A snorkeller swims towards the plane as the pilot sits on the float to tell us, “You’re taxi’s waiting”.

It’s now night time in front of Uluru (Ayers Rock). A waiter, dressed in black and white formal gear, tells us, “And dinner’s about to be served”.

In Sydney Harbour a woman stands with her friends in front of dazzling fireworks display. She says, “we turned on the lights”. Inland an Aboriginal dance troupe goes through its moves. A young woman says, “And we’ve been rehearsing for over 40,000 years”.

It’s back to the beach babe and she asks, “So where the bloody hell are you?”

Cool ad i would say... It showed many interesting side of the Australian life, with the surf, aboriginals and the great wild life... The concept had a lot of vibrancy in it and by ending it with a question, "So where the bloody hell are you?", it hooks and invokes an action to the viewer, "damn, i also wan to book the tickets now..." (at least for me...) And by choosing the beach babe to ask the question, it sure do many more wonders... Sex does sells... *wink*

Personally, i do not find the ad offending by the phrase... I feel it's like a slang that they use locally, juz like we use lah, lor and wah lau... Yes, it may sound rude to outsiders, but I believe it's a culture thing and countries and societies should learn to accept it and take it in their stride...

What happened in Canada for example, is a little shocking. The paragraph below is taken off a news report.

"Less than a week after it was first banned and then cleared for screening in the U.K., an Australian tourism ad featuring a bikini-clad girl asking prospective tourists "Where the Bloody Hell are you?" has been banned in Canada. Ironically, it wasn't the controversial question — a line described as "warm, friendly and inviting" — that got the ad banned, but its opening: "We've poured you a beer." This line was ruled unacceptable by the Canadian regulator, as it refers to an unbranded beer."

The Australian Tourism Minister, Fran Bailey, replied by thanking the Canadian authorities for the publicity... Yes, good or bad publicity is still publicity... By the ad creating a talk of the town, people are trying to view it way before the authorities passed it for viewing by searching it online... This has caused some interest and publicity for the ad and ulitmately, is good for Australia... All the more with the tourism message being carried across... The Australian Tourism Minister replied by thanking the Canadian government for providing free publicity for the ad, saying, "As far as this particular Canadian regulator is concerned, I'd love him to come out here and I'll buy him a beer and say thank-you."

On the whole, i like the ad very much... It really made me feel like getting the tickets to fly to Australia, answering to the bikini girl's call... *heehee* Alternatively, you can visit this website, http://www.wherethebloodyhellareyou.com/ to view the ad...

tO fLy Or NoT tO fLy?

2006-08-21T12:44:00.000+08:00

Our National carrier is recruiting for cabin crew... I'm in a little dilemma as to whether to sign up for it or not... I am interested to take up the position, but i do have my concerns...

1. If I were to be selected, and ultimately be given the opportunity to fly, I will end up working irregular hours. It will be a no-day-no-night kind of affair... The job will require me to fly even during odd hours like 3am in the wee hours of the morning... That will mean going to the airport at probably around 2am and serving passengers through the night... Irregular hours also mean irregular working days, inclusive of public holidays like Christmas or Chinese New Year... And the peak flying season will coincide with the vacation holidays period, where chances of going on holiday with bao bei will be sacrificed... All these will mean lesser time for bao bei, family and friends...

2. As you know, the percentage of females to males as cabin crew is generally distorted, with females majoring the scale... Furthermore, these girls tended to be good looking...

So by taking up this position will mean being close to the beauties and making bao bei feel insecure... On top of that, i will be overseas with these girls, far away from home... On this note, i would like to reassure bao bei that i understand your concern, and that you shouldn't worry as I will stay commited and loyal to you... I will always remind myself who is my soulmate and to whom my heart should go to... (bao bei, i love you...)

3. I'm also concerned about the career opportunities that comes with this job... What if a few years down the road, should i decide to leave the industry, or should they decide that it's time i leave, what am i going to do? With such a high paying job, it will definitely be a difficult task to re-adjust back to the normal lifestyle...

But the advantages seem to lure me too...

1. The money is definitely good... With basic, flying allowance, incentive, and huge bonuses, the pay pocket is going to be thick...

2. The opportunity to see the world... With so many destinations and flying routes, I will have lots of opportunities to explore different cultures and see the world...

3. Working in the service industry, image branding and public relations has always been something that i would like to explore in... This position will definitely give me a chance to try out a career in this field...

For now, i still have some time to really decide should I go for it... The interview is at Swissotel this weekend... Do check it out if you're interested...

wOmEn...

2006-08-07T23:23:00.000+08:00

This was forwarded to me from my friend... Enjoy... =)

One day, a seamstress was sewing while sitting close to a river and her thimble fell into the river. When she cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, "My dear child, why are you crying?"

The seamstress replied that her thimble had fallen into the water and that she needed it to help her husband in making a living for their family. The Lord dipped his hand into the water and pulled up a golden thimble set with pearls. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "No." The Lord again dipped into the river. He held out a silver thimble ringed with sapphires. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked again.

The seamstress replied, "No" The Lord reached down again and came up with a leather thimble. "Is this your thimble?" the Lord asked.

The seamstress replied, "YES." The lord was pleased with the woman's honesty and gave her all three thimbles to keep and the seamstress went home happy.

Some years later, the seamstress was walking with her husband along the same riverbank and her husband fell into the river and disappeared under the water. When she cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked her, "Why are you crying?"

"Oh Lord, my husband has fallen into the river!" The Lord went down into the water and came up with Mel Gibson. "Is this your husband?" the Lord asked.

"Yes," cried the seamstress. The lord was furious. "YOU LIED! That is untrue!"

The seamstress replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'no' to Mel Gibson, you would have come up with Tom Cruise. Then, if I said 'No' to him, you would have come up with my husband and had I then said 'yes' you would have given me all three. Lord, I'm not in the best of health and would not be able to take care of all three husbands, so that's why I said 'yes' to Mel Gibson."

The moral of this story is : WHENEVER A WOMAN LIES, IT'S FOR A GOOD AND HONORABLE REASON AND IN THE BEST INTEREST OF OTHERS. THAT'S OUR STORY, AND WE'RE STICKING TO IT !!!

mY eNcOuNtEr WiTh A wIsE oLd MaN...

2006-08-02T16:20:00.000+08:00

I had a lucky chance to meet an International Sales Manager this morning during my interview... From the moment I saw him, i knew he was different...

He's about 50 plus years old, and looked a bit eurasian... He speaks very good English, and carries himself very well... I shook his hand and it was a pair of firm broad hands...

He sat down and looked at my credentials, and started to make small talk, without making me feel small... He briefly explained to me what the job scope requires me to do etc... When i told him i'm not too sure whether i will be up to it, as i do not have any engineering background (it's an engineering company that sells spare parts...), this is what he said to me, with a tone a senior would use to advice a junior:

"Everyone is born with nothing initially, and has to learn and pick up skills and experience... You are young, at 22, and have a long way to go to gain experience... Even though you may not have any experience now, you will have in say, 5 years down the road... Experience is not important, but the attitude... You must possess the right attitude... We would rather have someone who has the right attitude, and we take time to train him up, than someone who has the wrong attitude..."

(What he said below touches me the most, and really set me thinking...)

"I always tell my son... You have to put in the best effort in whatever you do... Even if you have to be a taxi driver, you'll be the BEST taxi driver..."

I feel very fortunate, that I get to meet the International Sales Manager, and he talked to me nicely and gave me some really good advice... In the first place, how many people actually gets to meet someone who holds such a high post, and talk to you and gives you good advice? He even said that he doesn't know why, but he can continue talking to me on and on... In the end, he cut the conversation as he's afraid that he'll bore me... I assured him that i enjoyed the conversation as much as he does...

I would be very happy, to have a father like him, to receive good advice... and him being so RICH lah... I'm not saying that my dad is not good, but i think his son is very fortunate to have a wise old man...

I will try to keep these wise words in my mind, and hopefully, pass it down to my kids in future... I would then tell them: "A wise old man once said this to me......"

oF cArS & sPiZzA

2006-07-28T17:54:00.000+08:00

Leon and Xuan rented a Honda Jazz for his birthday celebration... Bao bei and i got a chance to hitch a ride in the Jazz... Coz we think-skinly followed them to Holland Village for lunch... We asked if we'll be intruding them, and she gave the 'roll-eyes' look... Talking about 'roll-eyes', i think i've been practicising that often these days, and might have perfected it.. hahaha... =)

It's a blue jazz... Quite pretty and sexy, coz the paint work looks new... Even the upholstery in the car has blue trimmings... And the car does performs.... It picks up speed fast, and i heard it is fuel efficient... The only downside is the space is confined and upright, and doesn't have a proper boot... Free, i want... Pay, maybe not... Will probably go for cars with boot like Altis, coz i'm a man that needs space to store my purchases and stuff...

We went to Spizza, which is a pizza place. (silly)

Oops... there's a chick on my pic!!

They're actually having a promotion of 'buy 1 large pizza and get 1 medium free'... And it costs only $19... Cheap rite? So we ordered just that... The specialty is that the pizzas are wood-fire baked, which is said to be healthier and tastier...

The wood-fire oven is behind the chef... Jazz music was playing in the background...

Pizza on the left is called Helena, which has grilled chicken (the green stuff), and the pizza on the right is called Pamela, which is mushrooms and ham...

Both pizzas are equally tasty, but i prefer the mushrooms wan as it has a very strong mushroom taste... The pizzas have very thin crust, which doesn't favour me, coz i like it thick and cheesy... I would say it's not too bad considering of the price and place... But it could have been better if there's more ingredients like cheese...

More flavourings?

On the whole, it's a pretty good place to chill out and dine with friends... My recommendation for Spizza @ Holland Village...

HoW dO yOu HoLd On To SoMeOnE yOu'Ve NeVeR mEt?

2006-07-28T17:23:00.000+08:00

Bao bei and i caught this show at Cineleisure yesterday, on it's OPENING DAY!!! Which means, we're the first few in Singapore to watch it!! heehee... *boastful grin*

how do you hold on to someone you've never met?

It is a clever story depicting the 2 characters, living exactly 2 years apart, but still able to communicate... wierd?? Exactly... That's why it's a clever story because it is able to capture the viewer to think, how is this possible?? And how is the story able to link it?? Well, you've got to watch it to find out for yourself!!

Spoiler Alert!!: There's a twist at the end of the show... (And i even heard some *sniff sniff* from those girls sitting behind us...)

Bao bei asked me at the end of the show: "Which do you think is better? This or 'Just Like Heaven'?"

I would say, 'Just Like Heaven' is better because it's a more romantic story that totally encompasses the viewer, whereas for this (Lake House), the catchy part of the show is the element of mysteriousness on how exactly such thing is possible... No doubt there are romances in the show, i still find 'Just Like Heaven' better... =)

However, i will still rate 4 out of 5 for this because of the clever story...

mAnGo MoUsSe

2006-07-25T23:48:00.000+08:00

Got this great mango mousse (i thot it was pudding until bao bei corrected me...) from one of the Italian (i suppose, since they sell lasagne...) cafe cum food outlet from the Railway mall...

Doesn't it look lovely?? Mama~mia...

Look at that soft tender pudding... Makes you wan to stick your tongue into it... *cheeky*

The mousse was soft and tender... and the mango taste was strong, but not too overwhelming to give a long after-taste, causing you to want for more... The strong taste could be due to the mango essence, other than the real mango if they were to really use it...

Railway mall actually have its own appeal... It has a laidback environment with many classy food outlets... It seems to make you feel like you're in another western country... There's a Rocky's Pizza, a fish n chips outlet, an italian cafe as mentioned above, local food stalls, pubs and Cold Storage... it's my first time there, and i will definitely wan to visit it again for some food and drinks, probably with daniel and gang... or probably to just shop at Cold Storage...

hUge UrGe...

2006-07-21T11:27:00.000+08:00

I took the train to the airport to send Robin off this morning... When i stepped out of the train, a huge urge went through my mind and body...

I WANT to take a jet plane and fly off for a holiday!!!

A beach resort or some cosmopolitian city like New York or Sydney will be nice... *slurp*

Out of the station, the bright sun was peering through the clear window glasses...

"What a great day to fly..."

tHE mIcKeY mOuSe ShOp...

2006-07-16T23:58:00.000+08:00

Yes... there is a Mickey Mouse shop located right at a place you never believe will exist until you're there and see it for yourself...

It's this dessert stall at the Redhill hawker centre...

You can never miss it as:

The signboard at the top of the stall has 2 Mickey Mouse characters, 1 holding a bowl of ice-kacang...
There are many Mickey Mouse ornaments surronding the stall...
Even the clock to tell the time is a Mickey Mouse clock!!
There's a LCD monitor playing Disney cartoons like Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck to entertain the customers in the queue...
It's one of the extraordinary stalls that has an extraordinary queue... the line of customers are never ending, with at least 15 in the queue... all for a bowl of chng teng, tau suan, and ice kacang...
The stall blasts loud techno music, which the stall holder either dances to it, or he danced in a momentum to serve his customers... His actions are so fixed that he seems like a robot... That multiply by 3 times the speed... Get the dancing picture??

I was one of the suckers who joined the queue for a bowl of chng teng... Not that i'm a sucker to join in the queue, but i wanted to have some cooling desserts as my throat was sore... There were only 2 desserts stalls, and i heard both have equally long queues... Seeing that the store in front of me has a very long queue, i went to the one on the next aisle... But that was closed... So i had to obediently follow the long queue that was forming up at this store...

I was getting a bit pissed with the long queue, as it doesn't seem to move... By the time when i'm nearing the stall, I have already been in the queue for approximately 15 mins... But, the cartoons saved the day... it sure made my wait seem shorter as i was entertained by the cartoons, which i have not watched it in many years...

And also entertained by the rhytematic robotic movements that the stall holder has...

What great entertainment to great lowfare hawker food... =)

~iT's My McDoNaLd'S...~

2006-06-03T21:34:00.000+08:00

*Jingle* ~~ "It's my McDonald's..."

This is one of our favourite McDonald's... Make a guess where is it... Is it the a) Zoo? b) Bird park? or c) Botanic Garden???

It's actually none of the above!!! Although it has lush greenery surronding the restaurant, it's not anywhere near the above named locations... It's actually near queensway, located at this place called Ridout...

If you still remember many years ago, there's this television commercial whereby this kindergarten teacher brings her little students to the zoo... But then there came a downpour, and they had to run to McDonald's to take shelter... They then started to have their meal there... And when the rain stopped, they walked down the bridge, going "xiao ya zi *little ducklings*, quack, quack, quack..." So i guess, many had the illusion that this restaurant is located at the zoo... But, no... it's NOT!!! See, the power of media...

Although this picture was taken about 2 weeks ago, that wasn't our first trip there... I first brought bao bei there about 3 years back... She was very amazed and surprised that there's actually such a nice outlet here, right where it doesn't seem that it will belong to... Dining here, it gives you a feeling that you're dining in the great outdoors, in a farm-like environment, where you dun even feel like you're in Singapore!!

We had these for breakfast.. 2 sets of hotcakes, a sausage Mcmuffin, hash brown, hot tea for me, hot milo for bao bei, & a free Dino toy from the happy meal set...

Proclaiming my love for bao bei, with the help of Mr. Hotcake... =)

After the meal were more pictures...

The front pathway from the carpark...

The pond area... It has many, many, many, tortoises inside... And they were huge!!!

This was just a small fraction of the total population... Most of them were bigger than the size of a human's palm...

So there you go... A nice recommendation for you... Dun say i never say ah? Anyway, thanks for tuning in to: "Our makan places, lots and found!!" =p

TuR kWa In My SaTaY bEe HoOn!!!

2006-05-27T22:43:00.000+08:00

I had my dinner at the Tiong Bahru Market this evening... It was a pleasant experience as there were many varieties of hawker food there... From zhe char, to chicken rice, hokkien mee to fried kuay teow, carrot cake to fried oyster, porridge to chee kway, and also the now famous, bah chor mee... It was a sightful, and also a mouthful... Spoilt for choices and not knowing wat to eat... Feel like having everything, but i only have 1 stomach...

My final choice was to have a humble plate of satay bee hoon...

I went up to the stall to queue, and ordered my noodle after a short wait... The pot of satay gravy simply looked yummy-licious... =) And given that the hawkers there had many years of hawkering experience, it surely will taste good too...

After i was served, i happily went back to my seat to enjoy my noodle... I peeled open the plastic wrapping to my disposable chopsticks, and was about to tuck into my hot warm noodle when i saw something very familiar... To my surprise, there's tur kwa in it!!! Not 1... not 2... but 3 pieces of tur kwa!!! Since when did satay bee hoon come with tur kwa?? Now the tur kwa has got so famous that it has also made its way to a plate of satay bee hoon?? Hmmm... tur kwa has invaded us!!!

Now, what if i go up to the uncle and make up a fuss? "Why you put tur kwa in my noodle when i didn't say i want tur kwa?" Imagine wat will he do... will he try to show me his CCTV footage? or will he show me his finger instead??

I checked around the stall... there was no CCTV camera... so even if he were to claim that he had asked me whether i wan tur kwa in my noodle, i dun think there's a way for him to prove it...

But i'm not going to walk up to the store to make a fuss... It's not because i'm afraid he will show me his finger, nor is it that i'm afraid to make a scene... i just feel that, since i'm given 3 pieces of tur kwa, just eat it lah!!

wOrKiNg ToO haRd???

2006-05-27T18:59:00.000+08:00

I've gotten this from the May's issue of the Reader's Digest...

Dave works long hours at the office and spends most evenings working out. His wife thinks he's pushing himself too hard, so for his birthday, she takes him to a strip club.

The doorman greets them, saying, "Hi Dave! How are you doing?"

Dave's wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to the strip joint before. "Oh, no," says Dave. "He's in my running club."

They take their seats and the waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual drink. His wife is getting uneasy, "You must have come here a lot for that woman to know what you drink."

"No, dear," says Dave. "That lady also works in the health club bar."

A stripper comes over to their table and puts her arms around Dave. "Hi, Davey," she says. "Want your usual table dance?"

Furious, Dave's wife storms out of the club and into a taxi. Dave gets in beside her and she starts screaming at him.

"All right, Dave?" asks the cabby, turning round. "Looks like you picked up a moody one tonite."

a BiG tHaNk YoU...

2006-05-13T00:16:00.000+08:00

I'm rather happy these days to hear that my blog has been visited by people!!! Heheh... Tankew ar... All those frends out there who visit my blog to read wat i write... i hope you guys dun visit my blog because:

1. You were too free and was blog surfing around and concidentally, chanced upon my blog...
2. You were blog surfing on someone's blog, who had a link to someone's blog, who had a link to me... Like a bit not sincere leh...
3. You visited my blog to try to get to know more blogs, so that you can go read about other people's lives, especially people of the opposite sex... (Damn kay-poh...)
4. You visited my blog, in the hope of finding any pics of pornographic materials, or in some way or another, contains or suggests materials of pornographic content... I'm sorry, i do not have, and do not post any of these...

On the other hand... I hope you visit my blog, because:

1. You enjoy all the musing that i write... Which explains why my blog address is known as "my-two-cents-worth"
2. You feel a 'sense of connection' with me when you read about my life... (as the Nokia's tagline says--Connecting People)
3. You just want to see how your dear friend, which is me, of course, is doing...

And i wanna thank all of you whom regularly visit, and bother to read wat i do have to say... A very big 'Thank You'... For all your support, and messages that you do leave behind... People like my loving bao bei, timothy, ah goy, and liqi, and maybe many others who never tell me they did visit my blog, but still have to thank... Your patronage spurns me on to want to produce more good quality postings, to entertain your boring days and nights... Because when the going gets tough, running out of creative things to write, and thought that no one actually bothers to read, the thought of you guys anxiously waiting, saliva dripping, yearning for more, just gives me the booster to write... Thank you ah, my dear frends!!

Lastly, can anyone teach me how to:

1. Put a tag board so that you guys can leave a message for me.
2. Put a counter so i know how many people actually do visit my ulu blog.
3. Insert a song clip so that you not only enjoy the sense of your sights, but also the sense of your hearing.

Before i end, just wanna humbly thank you guys again... Tankew ew for your wonderful support!! And please do come again!! =)

aN eVeNtFuL dAy...

2006-05-12T23:04:00.000+08:00

It's the Vesak day holiday, and my SOA frens are meeting up for a meal together, to get together, rekindle the friendship bond, and be merry... Our intial plan was to go to Marche at Heeren... Armed with the info of the arranged time and location, i headed down to Heeren...

When i reached there, i was shocked!! The boardings said that they're undergoing renovations at the moment, and do visit the other Marche outlet at Suntec City... I looked at my watch- correct time... Looked around, no familiar faces in sight... First thing crossed my mind--Am i being sabotaged??

So i took out my Nokia 6610 (my old reliable-drop-umpteen-times-and-yet-still-solid phone) and began to call the organiser, Ben...

Me: Hello?? Hey Ben, i'm here... it seems that Marche is closed for renovations...
Ben: Yah... I've actually made a reservation at Billy Bombers instead...
Me: So where are you now?
Ben: We're outside Heeren... Near the Old Chang Kee...
Me: Oh... I'm near the Balcony, I'll go over...

So, instead of Marche, we're going to Billy Bombers instead... And yet, i was still thinking of the rostti with sausage for the whole afternoon...

And as time ticked away, our frends began to start streaming in... And we headed up to Billy Bombers... It was packed and service was slow... They arranged for a row of 20 seats just behind the cashier for us... we made our order and happily chatted, to catch up on wat's going on for one another... Since we're all seperated into different units and camps, there were definitely lots to catch up on...

Food was served... Some of us ordered burgers... The 'Yin & Yang' and the 'All Stars' burgers looked damn good... It was probably 1.5 times the size of a McDonald's Big Mac, comparable to the serving that they served at Carl's Jr... And i had my 'Honey Stung Crispy Chicken something.... Or it was something like that... According to the menu, it was a 'Chef's recommendation'... But it wasn't very nice... Quite saltish in fact... Didn't really like it though...

Then, the ice water that we had asked for, took so long to come, until we had to ask for it again... And the most unexpected happened...

The waitress was serving the glasses to all of us... And when she moved behind my chair, to serve to people on this side of my table, she toppled 1 glass (i think), onto the back of my shirt!!! And my right arm, back and jeans were all wet... Cold and wet... I was just halfway through my chicken, and the water just came flushing down!!! The waitress was so pai-seh that she kept apologising... And my frends kept teasing us...

"Hey damien, you planned for this right? Strategy right?"

Hey... Firstly, i'm not someone who would do this kind of stunts kae? I'm juz a boring old boy who is not very good at tackling girls... (subjective to my opinion) And secondly, why would i want to sacrifice myself and my shirt for this? To get her number? Or a free meal? I'm not desperate to that extent kae? And thirdly, she's not that hot or pretty either... (Sorry, whoever you are, which i didn't get your name, and i dun think you would be reading this...)

So i said to her... It's ok, it's ok... I'm fine... Can you get me some servietts?? So she hurriedly go get a huge stack of them and passed it to me... And she kept apologising again... I understand her plight... So i just have to calm her down and to make the situation less tense by teasing,

"i'm really ok... anyway, it's just water right?"

And she said, "Yes, just water"...

So i assured her that i'm fine, and she went on to do her stuff... My frends were making the moment theirs, by saying... Hey... this is your strategy right? Oh please......... But they did say that she was so pai-seh that she kept blushing... If i were her, i would have tried to dig a hole and stick my head into it...

Along the conversation, one of my frend revealed that he is married, and the baby will be born in July... Oh Congrats!! It's going to be a baby girl!!! This guy is the same age as me, and i think his wife is the same age too... According to him, it was a shot-gun, but he already had intentions of tying the knot with her earlier... So the baby just seems to speed things up... Things are not going to be too hard on him as his family is rather rich, so not a problem at all... Anyway, he's a very responsible and capable guy, happy-go-lucky kind of personality... So he's not going to be in a deep shit... Anyway, he's wife is very model-like pretty... Tall and pretty... Seen her photo before... When he said his daughter is going to be born in July, he was all smiles... Hmm... going to be a happy father soon... And the question starts to pop in my mind...

"Isn't it heartening to see people settle down with a wife and kids?"

"But isn't it early? I would want to start a family too, but i dun think i'm financially capable..."

After the meal, i took a bus back from Orchard... The bus passed by the prestigious Holland Road, where the landed properties are... I was looking out at them... Nice beautiful condos, apartments, and detached houses with quiet surroudings... Fancy living in estates where neighbours are equally rich... The houses were beautifully lighted up with soothing spotlights, making the house very cosy and comfortable... And i thought to myself... It must be very lovely to be able to own that, coming home to a cosy place, where you can sit back and sip a cup of tea, sitting by the windows and watch the world go by...

Wat an eventful night, ending off with a little tour of the cosy posh district of the landed properties of Holland Road... I wish i would be able to own one of those units one day... =)

lAzY wEeKeNd...

2006-05-07T12:39:00.000+08:00

I've been feeling L-A-Z-Y lately... Lately as in terms of these 2-3 months, and not juz the past few days or weeks... All i wanna do over the weekends is to spend some time lazying around at home... I noe weekends dun come easy... Only after 5 days of work in camp/office etc... That should be reason enough to wanna spend some time out breathing in the fresh air of the outside world... But once weekends come, the energy to wanna go out and explore juz tire me down...

Firstly, where else is there to go? The places that bao bei and i visit seems to be the same week after week... We juz met her cousin at Marina Square last week... And bao bei went: "How come i always meet you here?"

And her cousin replied: "Well, i'm either shopping here or at takashimaya..."

Same sentiments... That's wat bao bei and i do all weekends too... you can either find us here at Marina Square, or Ngee Ann City... It seems that Singapore is too boring a place to be in... But actually, it's not... Well, there are certainly lots of shopping malls in this city, almost one at every MRT stop... Yet, we Singaporeans, or should i say, juz the 2 of us, seems to be only hanging around at these 2 spots... Yes, there's Suntec nearby Marina, and Wisma Atria and Plaza Singapura near Ngee Ann City... But, isn't all the malls offering the same products too? Giordano, Charles and Keith, U2, Topshop, Mango, McDonald's, Burger King and not forgetting, food court... It seesm to be a clone of malls everywhere...

So Saturday along Orchard Road, Sunday at Marina Square belt... Multiply by every week doing the same thing... Boring?? Yes... So much so that we always ask each other this question when weekend approaches... "Wat you wanna do?"

Since bao bei dun like to stay home, we will head down to the same old places week after week... Walking down the same aisle, passing by the same shops... And we can finish the whole of Marina Square in less that 45 mins, slow stroll mode... And wat next? Dunno... So i would much prefer to stay at home these days... Another plus point is, we can get to save money!! No transport fees, no food bills to pay when outside... Thristy? Water is aplenty in the kitchen... Food? No problem... juz whip up something... See?? there seems to be more benefits to staying at home than out...

Bao bei dun like to stay at home coz she claims that we do not have a place where we can be to ourselves... I agree... I do wan to stay home at my place... But there's not proper place where we 2 can be alone, watching our dvds, munching on munchies... Lying down on the bed, and the occassional kisses and hugs... Yes... I do very much yearn for these kind of lifestyle too... But, there's no room available for us!!! So, we end up out on the streets... Back to the cycle again...

Well, the notion may be true that after a week's worth of work, one should go out and enjoy the weekend, eating some nice delicious food and visiting the shops... But why not stay at home and enjoy the quiet peaceful time? lazying around... reading...

Yes, talking about reading, i do have many stuff to catch up on... My papers and magazines that i've bought but do not have the time to read... And not forgetting the book that i'm halfway through, or should i say, juz 10 % of it... See?? I have many things to do... Juz no time and no place... enough of walking aimlessly around town... Wat i need is some quiet time at home to stretch out my legs and enjoy a good read... Then followed by some pizza for dinner, and telly to last me to the nite... good plan? Hmm... yummylicious... And to top it off, having some kisses and huggies, and some good *** into the night... Whoo-hoo... This is wat a good weekend should be... =)

So... I'm not being lazy by wanting to stay at home kae bao bei? I juz wan some quiet time to doing wat i like... Reading and lazing around at home... Now, it is juz short of a perfect room where we can be to ourselves... So my wish for now: A well-layout room painted with soothing warm colours, with a two seater cushion sofa, complete with a leg rest, aircon room, a carpet to add to the coziness... Not forgetting a good comfy queen size bed for some romance, and a telly with simple sound system to watch programmes and dvds...

Dear geniue in the bottle, when will you fulfill my wish?

MiSs SiNgApOrE uNiVeRsE

2006-04-21T17:25:00.000+08:00

It has been the talk of the town everywhere in the papers, to the new edition of 8 days... The Miss Singapore Universe 2006... Although it has ended 2 weekends ago, the gossips and tongue waggering is still lingering around...

Well, this year's pageant is one of the rare few that i really sit down to watch it from start til end... Most probably because bao bei also wanted to watch it... The little woman has been rushing me home ever since we were at Ikea to do our little shopping... When we left the place late, at 7.15pm, she got anxious and really wanted to get home asap to catch it... And so we hailed a cab from there and reached home 15 mins later, just in time for the opening ceremony... Phew... And my bao bei was one happy girl...

According to the media publicity, this year's contestants are one hell of beauty and brains... Quite a number of them are graduates or under-grads... Probably just to blow off the huge mindset that beauty WILL and DOES NOT go with brains... Well, dunno how true is that... Not surprisingly, this year's contestants from our little sunny island were not that fantastic either... They still dun have the ability to make heads turn and eyes staring at them at every corner... I would modestly said that majority were all average, or even below average in the eyes of 'high quality' expected of pageant girls... Only a handful were really worth the vote...

Many did have a voluptuous hour glass figure, with cups size bigger than the average women that you would normaly see in Singapore... And the swimsuit segment, the most favourite of all segments for all the dirty old hum-samp men, really let the world see how good a figure they have... With the bikinis covering only vital spots of the body, you can even see the sacredly clothed bikinis trying to cover the oversize boobies... And bikinis, don't quite measure up to the functions of bras, that provide good support... When the girls walk down the aisle in their heels, you can see their boobs having a hard time doing their balancing act... That certainly will set many hearts racing among the men...

And i would say first runner up, Jade Seah, should have win... She did impressively well in the question and answer segment, and most importantly, she have the beauty!! Good gracious!!

I would say the most difficult question to answer during the Q&A would be her's... When the question picked by her came from the famous criminal defense lawyer, Subhas Anandan, everyone in the audience let out a big "Whoa......" followed by laughter and giggles... They must be thinking... 'You cham already lah... So chim, how to answer?" Anyway, her question was:

"If you were given a chance, what is the law you'd elect or amend in Singapore?"

And impressively well she did... She calmy answered that she would want the law on child pornography over the internet be enacted... That led to a wide round of applause from the approving audience... And with regards to the final round question, "What do you think of the notion that local men seem less attractive as compared to foreign men?" She wittly end off her answer with

"Local men are perfectly fine. They juz need to be trained a bit."

That again drew laughter and applause from the audience... I guess, in many men's heart and mind, and even soul, she would have, undoubtedly, win the the pageant... Which guy in the world can stand against beauty, with brains, and also a little wit and humour? Awww...

Anyway, disappointingly, the pageant title went to Carol Cheong, the big boobs girl... It was a close and tough fight when only 2 girls were left unannounced on stage... Between hot favourite Jade Seah and her... I bet many guys were very diasppointed with the results... Is it because she had bigger boobs, that's why she won the pageant? What about our witty Cherryl Fox and Fiona Xie lookalike, who had the foxy eyes that can mersmerized our hearts? Why didn't she make it to the crown?

The pageant reminds me of something... If you realize, only the hot favourites since the start of the show, would have gotten into the final 10 finalists, juz like in the case of Miss Universe Pageant... The usual countries will get into the close fight... Singapore? Tough luck... So really, the other girls that fall behind are juz there, to add to the numbers... Further proof? Remember the name standings that always appear on the LCD screen juz before the commercial break? It's the usual few that garners the top few positions... All top three names were the last three to be called off stage... Which leads me to think... the beauty pageant seems fixed... Once you're condemned, you're really gone...

Hmm... But i'm quite confident that our Jade Seah would soon be asked to sign a contract with MediaCorp, based on her popularity and beauty... Joanne Peh didn't win the pageant, but look at how successful she's doing? So, i think i would speak for all the guys, that we will be looking forward to seeing more of her on our little screen... For the Jade Seah fans, all you can do for now is to just go buy the latest edition of 8 days, flip it to the page that has her photo on it, and hug it to sleep... Maybe you'll dream of her tonite... Sweet dreams...

FiNgEr LiCkInG gOoD... slurp

2006-03-10T15:53:00.000+08:00

Hungry?? Call KFC Delivery...

lOOk WhO's TaLkInG nOw!!

2006-03-06T16:16:00.000+08:00

I was taking the lift up when this young mother and 2 little girls, about the age of 3 and 5, took the same lift as me... I asked the mother...

"Which floor?"

"5 please, thank you..."

Then, the 5 year old girl said, "5" too... Quite cute little girl...

Then, something interesting happened...

The 3 year old, hearing her sister said '5', mumbered out three words too...

"5... 1... 2..."

I turned and looked at her, and then i took a glance at her mother...

Little girl her age noes wat 512 is? I only know wat 512 is when i was in Sec 1 or 2... I wonder who taught her that? Or could it be that the parents said that to each other, not wanting their daughters to noe that they actually said 'i love you'... But, the young daughter seems to pick up afterall, juz that she doesn't noe wat it stands for...

Hmm... kids these days... Incredible... =)

mEaN wAt YoU sAy, SaY wAt YoU mEaN...

2006-03-06T15:51:00.000+08:00

I went to the nearby coffeeshop to buy lunch this afternoon... Wanted to buy the 'cai fun', otherwise known as the economic rice, or, rice and dishes... I was looking at the wide array of dishes when the young lady asked...

"Shuai ge, yao chi shen mo?" (Handsome, wat do you want to eat?)

My initial reaction was... Emm?? shuai ge? really ar? heehee... so happy to hear... Afterall, i was wearing my white army polo-tee and black army shorts, not too bad looking lah... That lady has definitely made my day...

So i went ahead to pick the dishes that i wan and tah-pow... Just when i was finished with my orders and about to leave, another guy came to the stall...

Guess what did she say this time??

"Shuai ge, yao chi shen mo?"

Then i turned to look at that guy... He's a little plump and bespectacled... Then 2 thoughts came to my mind...

1. Either she has no taste in guys, accepting substandards as standards, or...

2. She's calling out nicely to all the male customers, so that they will feel happier and order more...

I would choose to believe that it's the second reason... =)

GeNtLeMeN, sTaRt YoUr EnGiNes... VrOoM vRoOm...

2006-03-03T17:25:00.000+08:00

GeNtLeMeN, sTaRt YoUr EnGiNes... VrOoM vRoOm...

iT's A sMaLL wOrLd AfTeR aLL...

2006-03-03T16:54:00.000+08:00

A few months back, there has been some active debate and discussion, on whether NS evaders should face a heavier punishment and penalty... It started when this guy, by the name of Melvyn Tan, born in Singapore and left Singapore to Britain 30 years ago to pursue his musical studies and career... He subsequently became a British citizen and a famous classical pianist.

Last year, he was back in town to perform and judge some piano and violin contest. Him, having evaded NS for so many years, and stepping onto Singapore soil again, got into trouble with the law. He was then given a $3,000 fine for the whole evading issue... This led to Singaporeans making a huge whoo-haa over the incident... (Hai... Singaporeans being Singaporeans...) There was a huge debate on the vaious medias... One wrote into the papers asking: "Is our 2 years of NS, and 10 years of reservist life worth only $3,000?" This person is damn ngiao to even ask until like that...

I feel, since he's already gone for so long, and has become a famous musician, we should be proud that he was once born in Singapore, with family roots here... Why should we give him the cold treatment when he has brought some goodwill to Singapore? I feel that the way Singaporeans can react to the incident will only tarnish the good image he has built for us... Considering this, and that he was remourseful and regretful, i think $3,000 is still something enough... Because of the whoo-haa, he has since cancelled his concert and judging positions...

I feel we should judge these incidents on a case-by-case basis, and for goodness sake, Singaporeans, behave like how a first-world country citizens should behave...

Concidentally, while the article below was printed on the front few pages in 'Today' newspaper on the 2nd of December 2005, there was another article on the SAFRA card, which have privileges that rewards NS men for their work; bearing the same cardholder's name, printed on the next few pages down... Is this a small world, or is it that now SAFRA card also stretches out their privileges to NS evaders? Hmm... a point to ponder...

tHe nYp sEx ViDeO...

2006-03-03T15:21:00.000+08:00

By now, you should have heard of the homemade sex video circulating on the cyberworld. If not, then you must have been a sua-ku, living in a cocoon shell, tucked away on a faraway island in Timbatu...

It starred a young teenage girl of 17, (a pretty hot and sexy chick) performing some private sex acts with her 21 year old boyfriend (you lucky ba***rd), which include, ahem, stroking, oral sex, and the real thing... Phew... it was kind of hot... I've watched it with bao bei, and she's kind of calm and cool... Hmm... seems like no big deal to her...

The female lead of the self-made porn stars, whose name was reportedly know as Tammy, had actually kept video clips of their active sex life in her phone, but was reportedly lost thereafter. It was reported that the person whom sabo-ed her and exposed the clips on the net, did so because he/she was jealous of her, being pretty and successful... It was known that Tammy was actually a member of the cheerleader group in campus... Having known that she's a cheerleader, a sex icon and symbol on most guy's perception, and also that it's a homemade Singaporean sex video caused a huge crave for the clips online... It is not surprising to see the after effect evolving to this stage... How many times have an innocent homemade video, meant for own personal viewing, been spread online? And to top things off, a hot teenage Singaporean girl... Of coz it'll be a huge demand!!

It has been such huge demand and news that cyber users around the globe are actively searching for the clip as well... One of the famous website for the latest technology news actually had words and phrases to do with her, hitting the top spots of the search category... Words like 'Tammy NYP', 'NYP', 'Tammy', and NYP TAMMY'... How many a times will that kind of frenzy happen to our little red dot nation? I bet there are millions out there who never knew what 'Singapore' is, or where it is located on the world map... And most probably, for those foreigners who still have a clean state of mind, wanting to know wat 'Singapore' is, or where it is located, would check the word online... And probably the next website that guarantees high passenger volume is the Singapore Tourism Board's website... The management must be busy scratching their heads, "Why a sudden increase in volume?"

There are even items on sale, bearing words relating to 'Tammy'... I've seen websites selling T-shirts, bearing the words "I've f***ed TAMMY from NYP!!" Items like mugs and pins also have the same relevance of message... Those guys are definitely quick on their business minds, and if you ask any marketer around, he will definitely tell you, "Sex does sells"... Try having a commercial with a pretty hot chick, showing all the right curves, posing in front of you, giving you a sexy wet kiss, then wink at you and lustful words describing the product advertised, would you be interested to find out more, and probably buy?

I believe that the reason why this young couple were to video tape their active sex lives was because they wanted something intimate to share within themselves, and to build up the relationship and kinky-ness in them... Well, it sure is kinky... *slurp* But if you were to really want to do these kind of stuff, you should be prepared that the phone might be lost, like in this case... So, i have 2 tips to offer...

1. If you do have some clips of the sexual lives between you and your partner in your phones, do save it somewhere on a disc, and delete the one in the phone to prevent things like this from happening...

2. If you ever have the slightest thought that you wan to record something like this, and have been motivated to do so even more after this episode, the learning point is, PLEASE VIDEO TAPE IT ON A DIGITAL CAMERA OR SOMETHING!!! At least, it promises better resolution and sound system... And also the extreme disturbing noise of the camera phone being shifted here and there, and the image being tilted at a 90 degree angle!! It is actually quite uncomfortable to watch the clip having to tilt your head sideways...

Regarding this video recording issue, i did ask bao bei whether will we ever get to record things like these... (And, no prizes for the correct answer...) Well, the theory seems right... Recordings like these are solely meant for private personal viewing between the couple to build sexier and kink-ier relationship... Unless you wan to be a porn star and shoot yourself to fame (and also in the head), these recordings should be kept in a safe and dry place... (so that it doesn't turn mouldy...) A check by the newspapers reported that 1 out of 6 interviewed said that they will not mind recording their sexual acts with their partners, but these are for personal viewing only... I think i stand on the grass that is not so green for this case... Or are the other 5 juz purely lying? *hmm...* But anyway, i find it super kinky and, yes, i think that will be the ultimate fantasy of all guys...

Hmm... bao bei, bao bei... will you be the genie in the bottle and grant me the wish? *poor puppy*

After some searching online, i've managed to find the clip... Enjoy...

Oops!! It's tigger and elmo!!

And of coz, it's not that clip... Do try harder, if you're looking for it...

BaObEi'S 21st BiRtHdAy...

2006-02-20T14:43:00.000+08:00

We had a chalet at downtown east costa sands to celebrate bao bei's 21st birthday... We checked in on friday afternoon, to room K2016...

We had wanted to go for a dip in the pool, but the weather doesn't seem to be too enticing, so we lazily hanged around in the room... We went out to the shopping areas to explore, and dropped by at McDonalds for a little snack... Bought a McNuggets Happy Meal, and the free Pokemon toy was given to her cousin, Shy'ann...

We went back to the room again as it was too early for dinner... After lazing around for a while, we took the bus out to White Sands for our dinner and grocery stuff shopping... We had dinner at this Thai-Chinese restaurant (more like Muslim) called Magic Wok, similar to the Sakura at Far East Plaza. Bao bei had seafood hor fun, and I had beef hor fun... We ordered a honey chicken too... It's actualy fried chicken, stir fried with honey and sesame seed... Not too bad... We had a very filling dinner...

Next, we went to NTUC to grab some stuff for the bbq... Bao bei wanted to get some cheese for Debbie... She carefully selected one package that is in a good condition... Happy like a mouse, she juz slipped it out of her hand and it dropped onto the ledge, causing a dent on its edge... And i mentioned 'lan le'... And she juz laughed non-stop... hmmm... =) we bought some tidbits, packet campbell soup, hotdogs and sea stick, syrup, disposable cups and toothpaste... We checked out of NTUC and went to McDonalds for their comeback menu-Chocolate Milkshake... Bao bei found it too chocolatey, while i found it too milky... she was the one who wanted the milkshake, but i ended up drinking 85% of it...

We went back to our chalet and watched tv on the bed... Bao bei was tired and wanted to sleep, but i wanted to watch my tv... so she waited up and watched with me... We made ourselves the mushroom and chicken campbell soup... Had our hot cup of soup and went to bed...

Next morning, we woke up early for our breakfast at Burger King... We were one of the first few customers... I had a Big Breakfast Meal while bao bei had a croissant sandwich...

We went back to our room to change into our swimming costume and went for a swim... The sun was not too strong initially, until when we were about to go did it come out in full force... We only managed to get a little tanned after all...

We went back to wash up after the swim... After that was lunch at one of the restaurants at the shopping area, called Different Taste... I had their signature dish, Penang Fried Kway Teow, and bao bei had their Yang Chow Fried Rice... We shared a prawn and tofu hotplate and barley drink... Again, we had an ultra full lunch...

We went back to the room to rest for a while before her family came... After that, i went to collect the cake with her dad...

It's time for bbq... The fire was set and the food went onto the wire mesh to barbeque... The evening progresses and her relatives and friends begin to arrive...

Then came the cake cutting time... Bao bei went on to make her wish (wonder what she made) and blow her cake... The response from the guests about the cake was good, which made it all worthwhile for the money spent... Our gang of friends stayed on to chit chat all the way until about 2am in the wee morning... After they have left, we quickly went to shower up and went to bed...

Woke up a little late the next morning... Quickly packed up and checked out of the room... We carried all our barang barang and went to McDonalds for breakfast... We took a cab home from there, and that comes to the end of our 3 day 2 nite chalet...

Bao bei and I had quite some memorable memories, with the cosy time spent together before other people invaded our privacy, namely the first half of the days there at the chalet... We spent some memorable and private time together, which feels like we were on our honeymoon... And it was a totally beautiful experience... I really hope we can do it again soon... Now, i just can't get it out of my mind... =)

VaLeNtInE's DaY pArT 2...

2006-02-20T13:39:00.000+08:00

So this is how the cake looks like... Totally delicious... Thick chocolate cream icing on the outside, with 2 layers of chiffon cake, separated by another layer of chocolate icing... Hmmm... Ultra chocolatey rich and delicious... =) If only i'm not too full after dinner, i could have gone for another few slices... If you can't see clearly what the gold coloured card says, it reads, 'Love, Breadtalk'.... Yeah... It's Valentine's day after all... Everything has got to do with 'Love' and done with 'Love'... Juz like that cake specially bought for the occassion for my bao bei...

And wanna see what i've got from my bao bei? Bao bei gave me a 'Me to you' card, with all the sweet stuff in there, and also balloons... Not those lubricated balloons that comes in aluminium wrappings, with various designs and flavours, that can be rolled out to a pretty long length, but juz normal heart-shaped balloons... 5 in total... It's an ultra sweet thought and job by my bao bei-- Always the one, never to fail to do sweet things for others, esp me...

This is how it looks like... With a Me-to-you bear note, which reads, 'somebody out there cares about you and always will'

And this is the top view, which looks like a flower... Amazing job by bao bei...

That ends my valentine's day celebration for this year... I'd a pretty good one this year, and i hope bao bei share the same sentiment as me too... I love you bao bei... =)

VaLeNtInE's DaY...

2006-02-14T13:40:00.000+08:00

Today's Valentines Day... I juz came back from holland village... Every corner i go, there's vendors selling flowers and cakes... lots of selection... The flower vendors are busy preparing their bouquets of flowers, waiting for their customers to come a-knocking and trade at cut throat prices... Luckily my bao bei is not particular about receiving flowers on valentine's day... If not, i'll be like those poor blokes, burning a hole in their pockets...

The reason why i'm at holland village is because, i too, wanted to get something for her... It's valentine's day after all, and since i'm on off, i thought i should make full use of the time and prepare something special... Although some may argue that valentine's day seems to be too commercialized with spending and showering with gifts and celebrating love, these can be done on normal other 364 days of the year.. But, in my opinion, since the date has been set aside, why not juz celebrate it... No doubt you can still make everyday a valentine's day, but doing something special on a date specially set aside makes it all the more cherished and memorable rite? So, the argument seems to be those fellas out there are trying to make themselves feel better without a special date... *sour grapes*

Well, i passed by Breadtalk and saw something in their fridge window display... Some specially created cakes for v-day, and flowers decorating round the displays... The lady over the counter said, "the cakes come with a rose!!" Hmm... Cakes and a stalk of flower... Not too bad... Price still manageable... But given that this month that i'm really broke, that amount for the cake seems a little heavy on the pocket too... But then again, it's v-day, and it comes with a rose... Okay lah... buy lah... buy lah... So the lady packaged the cake with a nice ribbon, and carefully selected a nice-looking rose from the fridge for me... Sweet thought of her... =)

That's the cake with the rose... Can't open the box though...

So there's my cake... Happily bought it and went back home... Wonder what's for tonite for valentine's day... =)

Actually, we kind of had a formal valentine's day dinner last friday at fish & co... It was crowded, and we had to wait for a seat... meanwhile, we took out our camera and took some self-portrait...

This is one of the nicest one...

There's actually a band of 2 guitarist playing some live music and singing some love songs and pop hits, creating a nice cosy atmosphere... I love the place totally... The staff served with a smile, no matter how busy they looked... They seem to be enjoying their work... And the food tastes absolutely fantastic too... We ordered a seafood platter for two, completed with a set of asparagus soup, passion fruit drink, and an ice cream to top up the bill to above $50 for a photo frame...

Seafood platter for two: comes with grilled fish, prawns, mussels, calamari, fries and raisins rice, with 2 slices of lemon... there's the soup behind, and fish on the right...

The night ended off with bao bei coming over for the night... hmm... sounds romantic and kinky... But it could be better if we had the room to ourselves... Then that would be perfect... =)

Have a nice romantic valentine's day... =)

iF i KiSsEd YoU...

2005-12-27T16:10:00.000+08:00

If i kissed you

Would fireworks fly

Would angels sing with lollipops

Would dinosaurs cry

Would babies all gurgle in laughter and surprise

I i kissed you

If i kissed you

What would Michelangelo say

Would he still have sculpted David

Would we be immortalized in clay

Would the poets write of love like ours

Would John Donne have his say

If i kissed you

You could be one in a million

You could be the one for me

But i guess i'll never know if i never try

I guess i'll just have to grab you in my arms and kiss you

If i kissed you

Would you lose track of time

Would you feel a surge of happiness

Running up your spine

Would you run naked in the street

With a tattoo of my name on your behind

If i kissed you.

Oh, if i kissed you

Yeah, if i kissed you.

This is my favourtie song of the moment, If i kissed you, by local artiste Corrinne May. It's a nice catchy song with meaningful lyrics in it...

2 oLd MaN...

2005-12-27T16:05:00.000+08:00

Two old men decide they are close to their last days and decide to have a last night on the town. After a few drinks, they ended up at the local brothel.

The Madam takes one look at the two old geezers and whispers to her manager, "Go up to the first two bedrooms and put an inflated doll in each bed. These two are so old and drunk, I'm not wasting two of my girls on them. They won't know the difference."

The manager does as he is told and the two old men go upstairs and take care of their business.

As they are walking home the first man says, "You know, I think my girl was dead!"

"Dead..?" says his friend, "why would you say that?"

"Well, she never moved or made a sound all the time I was loving her."

His friend says, "I think mine was a witch.",

"A witch!? why would you say that?"

"Well, I was really getting into making love to her, kissing her on the neck and on down and then around her ass and when I gave her a little bite, she farted and flew out the window.

RiNg~RiNg

2005-12-27T16:00:00.000+08:00

((((ring)))) (((ring-g-g-g-g))) *** pick up ***

"Hello?""Hi honey, this is Daddy...is your Mummy near the phone?"

"No Daddy, she's upstairs in the bedroom with Uncle Frank."

After a brief pause Daddy says, "But you haven't got an Uncle Frank, honey!"

"Oh Yes I do, and he's upstairs in the bedroom with Mummy, right now!"

"Uh Okay then......here's what I want you do. Put down the phone, run upstairs and knock on the bedroom door and shout to Mommy and Uncle Frank that Daddy's car just pulled up outside the house."

"Okay Daddy!"

A few minutes later the little girl comes back to the phone.

"Well I did what you said, Daddy."

"And what happened?" he asks.

"Well, Mommy got all scared, jumped out of bed with no clothes on and ran around screaming, then she tripped over the rug and went flying out the front window and now she's all dead."

"Oh my God!!!!! And what about your Uncle Frank?"

"He jumped out of bed with no clothes on too and he was all scared and he jumped out the back window into the swimming pool..... but he must have forgot that last week you took out all the water to clean it, so he hit the bottom of the swimming pool and now he's all real dead too."

*** long pause ***

Then Daddy says, "Swimming pool???? Is this 555-7039?"

No! This is 555-7093" the little girl said.

"Oooooppppssss....sorry wrong number!"

tHe GoOd DaYs...

2005-12-23T15:56:00.000+08:00

50 things Singaporeans born in the 70s and 80s can identify with...

1. You grew up watching He-man, Transformers, Ultraman, Batman, Carebears, Road-Runner, Bugs Bunny, The Ghostbusters, Tom & Jerry, Smurf , Mickey Mouse and Ninja turtles.

2. You wake up early every Sunday morning at 9am to watch the cartoons on "Good Morning Singapore"

3. You know what SBC and TCS stands for.

4. You had to brush your teeth with a coloured mug in Primary school after recess time with all your classmates beside you. The teachers said you must brush each side 10 times.

5. You were there when the first chinese serial, the Awakening was shown on TV.

6. YOur favourite actors and actresses were Huang Wen Yong and Xiang Yun. Next Were Li Nan Xing and Zoe Tay, followed by the Aiyoyo lau shi-Chen LiPing

7. Internet? What the hell is that? So you thought a decade or more ago.

8. You find your friends with pagers and handphone cool in Secondary school. And we would send Alpha-numeric messages and send weird voicemails and operator-assisted text messages

9. SBS buses used to be non-airconditioned. The bus seats were made of wood and the cushion was red. The big red bell gave a loud Buzzzzt! When the aircon buses came on, you were very excited to take them. Then came the double-deck air-con bus, known as "The Super Bus".

10. Trains and bus rides used to be paid by using the magnetic farecards. Red ofr children's card, green for adults, purple for senior citizens and green fore 1 trip tickets. Bus fares can be paid by slotting the magnetic farecards into the red machine at the entrance of the bus, then press your value and the farecard comes out with the bus ticket.

11. You've probably read Young Generation magazine. You know who's Acai the constable. And Vinny the Vampire too and Acai has like 2 or 3 books in a series! YG jokebooks too.

12. You were there when they first introduced MRT here (YioChuKang to ToaPayoh). You went for the first ride with your parents and you would kneel on the seat to look at the scenery.

13. Movie tickets used to cost only $3.50. Seat numbers were scrawled onusing big red pencils. Ushers brought you into the cinemas using big metallic torchlights.

14. Gals were fascinated by Strawberry Short Cake and Barbie Dolls.You also collected Care Bears stickers, trying to complete the impossible task of filling up the sticker book.

15. You always bought tibits called Kaka(20 cents per pack), Beebee (10cent per packet) and Ding Dang(50 cents per box), that had a toy in it and it changes every week not forgetting the 15 cents animal crackers and the ringpop. Mamee tibits came with stickers in it too.

16. All that you know about Cantonese is from the Hong Kong serials youwatched on TV2.

17. You grew up reading ladybird READ IT YOURSELF? Hardy Boys, Nancy Drew,The Three Investigators, Famous Five and Secret Seven were probably the thickest story books you ever thought you had. You also love Enid Blyton's Enchanted Wood and anything by Roald Dahl.

18. Civics and Moral Education was Hao(3) Gong(1) Min(2).

19. Dear Mr Policeman used to be part of Social Studies classes.

20. KFC used to be a high class place and let you use metal forks and knives.
21. The most vulgar thing you said was asshole and idiot and... You just couldn't bring yourself to say the hokkien relative.

22. Catching was the IN thing (a.k.a. Police and Thief) and twist or "choap" was the magic word.

23. Your English workbooks was made of some damn poor quality paper that was smooth and yellow. (That's why they never let us use felt-tip pen)
24. Some part of your school was ALWAYS haunted, like the toilet or clock tower or a certain block. You walk fast to avoid them.
25. The only computer lessons in school involved funny pixellised characters in 16 colours walking about trying to teach you maths. You printed with noisy dot matrix printers and use computer papers with two rows of holes at the sides.
26. Waterbottles, with your favourite cartoon character on it,were slinged around your neck and a must everywhere you go.

27. Hopskotch, five stones,chateh and zero point were all the rage with the girls and boys too...

28. Science was fun with the balsam and the angsana being the most important plants of our lives.

29. Who could forget Ahmad, Bala, Gopal, Sumei, Peihua, Xiao Ming, Xiao Hua, Sue and John, eternalised in the math textbooks. Even Mr Wolly, Mr Yakki were in the english textbooks.

30. You did stupid exercises like seal crawl and frog jumps.
31. Every Children's day and National day you either get pencils or pens with 'Happy Children's Day 1993' or dumb files with Happy National Day 1987'.

32. During every Chinese New Year, Racial Harmony Day or Childrens' Day, School children are allowed to wear their cultural costumes or their own clothes. Childrens' Day and Teachers' Day will consist of parties in the classrooms

33. The upper primary children have to play buddy for the younger kids like big sister and brother.

34. Chinese teachers were always old, boring and damn fiercelooking. Your form teacher taught you maths, science and english.
35. You need to read a certain number of books in a year to get a badge to add to your collection. Same for the blue science experiment card.

36. The worksheets were made of brown rough paper of poor quality.
37. You went to school in slippers and a raincoat when it rained, and you find a dry spot in the school to sit and wipe yourself dry.Then you wear your dry and warm socks and shoes.

38. You listened to Xin(1) Yao(2). Remember Eric Moo's Kopi'O','Sunglass'etc?
39. After exams, you brought game and watch to school, and play cardgames ,like 'snap' and 'donkey', and you also play pick up sticks and snakes & ladder and the aeroplane board game. Either this or you would play those cards comparing aeroplanes, warships, or tanks; who would have more firepower or speed or weight, etc.
40. You remember you uncles, big brothers and father screaming and shouting in front of the TV when the S'pore soccer team (always in blue jerseys) play against the Malaysians.

41. Your friends considered you lucky and rich if your parents gave you $2 or more for pocket money everyday.

42. During class gatherings, parents always come along in case someone gets lost at Orchard Road.

43. You freak out when the teacher tells you to line up according to height and hold hands with the corresponding boy or girl.

44. Handkerchieves were a must for both genders
45. Collecting notebooks, erasers and all kinds of stationery was a popular thing. The school bookshops will always be crowded with kids wanting to buy these stationaries during recess time.

46. Autograph books were loaded with ?Best Wishes?, Forget Me Not?, and small poems like Birds fly high, hard to catch. A Friend like you, hard to forget?

47. Class monitors and prefects loved to say "You talk somemore,I write your name ah!?" You will have to take out your book and read quietly in the hall before school starts.

48. You'd listened to Oasis, Jason Donavan, Kylie Manogue, Take That,Boyzone, Backstreet Boys, Nirvana, Blur, Ash and Tommy Page
49. Large, colourful schoolbags were carried. And fanciful pencil cases with lots of small tiny drawers, trays, sharpener or thermometer, that pop out at the push of a button were the 'in' thing.

50. You brought every single book to school, even though there was one thing called the timetable, written on the inside cover of your little blue notebook.

Haha... The good old days... =)

ChArAdEs ~ BaNg-CoCk??

2005-12-22T23:48:00.000+08:00

A cute cartoon Baobei sent to me...

"Bang... Bang... eh... Bang-Cock?"

JuSt LiKe HeAvEn...

2005-11-18T18:21:00.000+08:00

Went with bao bei to watch 'Just Like Heaven' at Jurong Point last sunday... Before the show, I thot that it's a very normal show, with the usual love story and that's about it... But i was wrong... it turned out to be much better, far exceeded my expectations...

The show's about this young promising doctor, whom is on her way to meet her blind date when she met a car accident... The show then moved on to show the guy going around to look for his perfect new house... He didn't seem to like any until he comes around this particular unit, which comes with a rooftop balcony to the unit... He rented it and moved in... This is where the guy meet the girl, the spirit...

The girl doesn't now that she is a spirit, and thot that the guy had invaded into her house... Likewise, the guy thought that the girl had invaded her house, whom keeps claiming that the house belongs to her... After some time does she realise that she's actually a spirit, and she wanted to know how she died... So they went around together searching for her identity, until they found out that she's actually a doctor working at this particular hospital, and is in a coma from the accidient... The guy and girl then starts to fall in love along the way... They also found out that the girl is actually the blind date that he is going to meet too... And at the end of the day, the spirit went back to her body and she awakens, just in time before they pulled the plug on her...

But when she awakes, she can't recognise who he is... After she is discharged, she went home to find that her rooftop had turned into a beautiful garden, which she had always wanted in her life... The guy gave her a goodbye kiss, and that's when she remembered everything from wat she did when she was a spirit...

And they lived happily ever after... *sweet romance, good movie*

Verdict: ****

eNeMy oF tHe sTaTe...

2005-11-18T17:53:00.000+08:00

This was a long ago show... i took the dvd out from the cupboard to watch... had wanted to watch this piece for a long time... and today, finally, sat down for it...

It's about this attorney (Will Smith), or wat we call lawyer in local terms, whom met his friend who was on the run... the friend dropped a video tape into his shopping bag, without him knowing, which contains the killing of a congressman, or minister in local terms... the friend was knocked down by a fire engine while on the run... Now, with the tape in his hand, the killers of the crime come hunting down for him, and he doesn't know wat is it that they want from him...

The mastermind of the crime is apparently a fellow congressman, whom is on the opposite side of the victim... the congressman wants the bill to be passed down in congress, for the rights to use sophisticated surveilliance on people, in the name of national security... The victim got murdered coz he disagreed... And the crime is being unknowingly caught on tape by an environmentalist, which is the friend of Will Smith...

So the show is about using sophisticated tracking tools and surveilliance to track and hunt him down, leaving him with almost nowhere to hide since his whereabouts are always known by satellite imaging... The show uses all kinds of tools that will make you go, *wow*...

There was a scene which says, "Phone lines are being tapped all over the world, that once you mentioned the word 'bomb', 'president', or 'allah', your identity will be tracked and checked through thoroughly, and that already happened 20 years ago... *wow*

The movie brings me to certain points...

1. There are many classified tools to track and collect intelligence, check on your personal particulars like bank accounts, spending history, your family and friends related...
2. Then, isn't it scary to be tracked every minute and second, with no space to breathe? Like invading your privacy...
3. And isn't it more scary, to not know that you already have been tracked?

So it may be good to have intelligence going around to secure our homeland security, but it will be terrible to let it fall into the wrong hands...

It's a good 2 hour movie that is worth watching, worth every minute of the 2 hours... it's exciting action-packed from head to toe, leaving you with no space to breathe, while Will Smith is being hunt down with no space to breathe also... The story line is smart, sharp and witty, with new things that you can learn form the show... Eg: the various kinds of surveilliance devices that the authorities can use... It is a show worth watching and you should not miss it...

Verdict: *****

tHe wOrLd oF MaRkEtiNg...

2005-11-13T00:30:00.000+08:00

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, I am very rich. Marry me! That's Direct Marketing.

You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says, He's very rich. Marry him. That's Advertising.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say, Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me. That's Telemarketing.

You see a gorgeous girl at the party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you email her and say, Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me. That's Electronic Marketing.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to the front and tell everybody, Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me, while at the same time looking at the girl. That's Public Relations.

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say, I'm rich. Marry me. She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. That's Customer Feedback.

PuT tHe LiMe In ThE cOkE......

2005-11-13T00:18:00.000+08:00

"Put the lime in the coke, and drink it from the can...

Put the lime in the coke, and drink it from the bottle..."

This is the commercial song for the new Coca-Cola with lime... And bao bei will always get so excited when i cheekily sing this song to her... =)

Today, i finally got my hands on it and tried it...

Verdict: Taste like normal coke, with a little tinge of lime in the after-taste if you keep it in your mouth and not swallow it... Otherwise, you wouldn't be able to taste the lime... Like in the case of the Coca-Cola light with lemon... Basically, it's juz like the lemon predescendant, juz that this one's lime...

LiFeLiNe...

2005-11-11T16:49:00.000+08:00

I was watching the 1 hour premiere of the new channel 5 drama, Lifeline, last nite... It's a drama about the action of the SCDF and the police force... And i'm a little impressed with it...

The show has very expected drama-mama scenes... the first episode is about a mulitple collision of a LPG carrying truck, with a speedster and a blur-cork driver... The speedster managed to stop in time to not hit the truck, but the blur-cork driver, whom is travelling so slowly, still manages to ram into the rear of the car, causing the speedster to ram into the truck... the couple in the second vehicle got terribbly crushed by the vehicle and the speedster died... leaving the girlfriend to be rescued by the force... At the same time, one LPG gas cylinder fell off the truck, and caused some leakage... The girlfriend had to have a leg amputated to be rescued out, and the medical team were waiting for the doctor to arrive when the truck driver lit a cigarette to calm his fears... When Gurmit shouted at him, he kan-cheongly threw his cigarette away and caused a huge fire... Gurmit then asked everyone to evacuate... And him being the hero, rushed to the crushed car, took out a swiss knife, and cut the girl's leg, pulled her out of the car, and escaped the explosion... all done in just a short period of time... *wow*

Other than that, there were many pretty faces... Cheryl Miles being the paramedic, current girlfriend of Gurmit... Michelle Chia, ex-girlfriend of Gurmit, whom is also a paramedic, Ong Ai Leng, the policewoman, and also sister of Timothy Nga... And Timothy Nga, also a firefighter like Gurmit... The boyish looking Adam Chen is the policeman on the show, partnering with Ong Ai Leng...

I'll certainly watch the drama again... More for the babes and hunks, than the drama-mama action... =)

tHe SuBaRu ChAlleNgE 2o05...

2005-11-11T13:54:00.000+08:00

So indeed, i went to the Subaru Challenge at Ngee Ann City Civic Plaza to take some photos and video, and to soak in the camaraderie as well... I chose a good timing for that day... Reached there at around 12.45, 15 mins before the break time, to get a good spot for my video taking... Coz bao bei will be practising her piano, i thot that i'd bring the event on video right before her eyes...

I must say this year's challengers are not as strong as last year... By 1pm on sunday, 24 hours into the game, only 56 teams are left from the 217 teams participating in this year's challenge... after the 1pm break, another 2 teams dropped out, leaving behind 54 others... On monday evening, i watched the evening news at 6.30 pm to see how's the progress going... Only six teams are left in the game... And at 9.30pm's news reporting, on 4 teams are left... I knew that the challenge is going to end either in the wee hours of the morning, or early next morning... On the 9.30 news, the reporter interviewed the only lady participant from the 4 teams left in the game, she appeared refreshed and still very excited... like she could still go on for another 2 or 3 days... when the cameraman showed around the event, the other male contestants are visibly shack and restless...

And the challenge is over...

At 5.31am on tuesday morning, after 64 and half hours into the game, the winners of the subaru challenge 2005 are out... Indeed, the team with the female participant emerged the winner... beating the other 3 teams with male-male partnering... The 36 year old guy, with his 23 year old girlfriend (13 years age gap!!), won themselves a $60,000 subaru impreza each!! Watching the news coverage on tv, the second last team had a participant whom had had his hand slipped off his palm size decal which he held on to dearly for the past few days... He didn't want to give up on the car and contined to hold on onto the decal... After much persuasion from the event organisers did he decide to let go... The most poor thing about these people is that they had held on as equally long a time as the winning team, but had to see the prize winning go to the other team as they are -- not the winners... and no consolation prize was given to them... It was juz a matter of seconds, and the car is lost...

On the whole, this year's challenge was not as long lasting as last year's... My conclusion is that, as this year's challenge is based on a team, any one of the team members who had their hand slipped off would mean the other team member would be out too... therefore, doubling the chance of getting ousted... Secondly, the 1st partner was the one whom called through to the radio station to gain a chance to the challenge... If the partner that he roped in was not as excited as he is, which he may juz be taggling along with him, he may not last as long as him, and cause him to be oust as well... comparing to the previous year's challenge, when it was on the individual... Since he made himself the chance to get on to the competition, he would naturally go all the way out to maintain his position in the challenge...

Anyway, below are the pics to the event... enjoy.. =)

The guy on the right, with his hands inverted, has the most difficult position... Most of the participants with that position has been ousted... Noticed that girl at the centre of the boot, back facing the camera? I think she's the winner of this year's challenge... This is the car where the winners were emerged...

And the 5 min break starts now... Participants running to their toilet break and lunch...

Getting some rest before it starts again...

Getting ready to begin another 6 gruelling hours...

And the winning team is...

The girl is actually quite pretty... =)

tHe SuBaRu cHaLLeNgE... "VvRRooomm, VvRRooomm..."

2005-11-02T23:22:00.000+08:00

It's the time of the year again!! The Subaru Challenge is back!! This time round, upped the stakes, upped the fun, upped the excitement!!

This year, it's no longer juz an individual challenge, but a dual partner team work... and not juz one Subaru Impreza for the winner, but one for each of the team... which makes it, 2!!

Likewise as last year, challengers-to-be will have to call up the radio station to qualify for a chance for the event... and this year's password to the game is, "Vroom, vroom..."

So this is roughly how it sounds:

DJ: Good morning!! this is 987fm... let me hear your engine...
Contestant-to-be: Vroom, Vroom!!
DJ: Congratulations!! You have won for yourself and a partner for the Subaru challenge! So who would you be bringing along?
Contestant-to-be: Erm... My boyfriend?
DJ: So does he noe about this?
Contestant-to-be: Nope... it's a surprise for him...
DJ: So no matter whether he wans to participate, you die die also wan him to enter the challenge with you, am i right?
Contestant-to-be: Yup, that's right...

(Poor Boyfriend...)

The rule of this year's challenge is that a team of two will take part in the game... Any one of the two from the team whom falls out will lead to the other partner in the team to fall out too... Exciting? Definitely. In another words, the partners will have to 'dong' all the way, to not let the other partner down...

That leads me to think... If bao bei and I were to go, who would be the first to drop our hand?? haha... it may not be the weaker sex, but me... coz girls have a greater tolerance for pain... And perseverance? I'm not too sure who would win... haha... maybe we should go and try... But that is when 'The Subaru Challenge' upgrades to 'The Volvo Challenge'... Then i die die wouldn't let go!!!

So for now, i'll juz look forward to the event this weekend, held at Ngee Ann City Civic Plaza, to see how the contestants do... Hopefully the weather would be kind to them, so that the challenge is more humane to bear... And we shall wait for the this year's winners to be born... Good luck guys!!! =)

gLuTToN's BaY @ eSpLaNadE

2005-10-29T23:36:00.000+08:00

Had our dinner at Glutton's Bay at Esplanade... Bao Bei had fried hokkien mee while i had char kway teow... Followed by some BBQ chicken wings... Our noodles cost $4 each, and the chicken wings at $1.20 each...

Verdict:
hokkien mee: ****
char kway teow: ****
chicken wings: **** half
price: slightly high
Atmosphere: *** (it's a nice place, but juz a little too stuffy and warm...)

Makansutra Gluttons Bay is opened from 6pm to 3am, nightly...

The row of food stalls, totaling 12...

Close up of the bbq chicken wing stall and Fei Shiong fishball noodle...

Thye Hong char kway teow

Thye Hong fried hokkien mee

Our dinner...

Crispy bbq chicken wings... *slurp*

After dinner, we to walk walk...

This is the last shot when the camera went out of battery...

StAr iDoL

2005-10-29T23:34:00.000+08:00

Was at Marina Square with bao bei when we spotted this event, Star Idol... They were holding an outdoor promotion to gain awareness of their new finalists... Artistes spotted include: Hosts Zhou Chong Qing and Ng Hui, Irene Ang, hunky Ix Shen and Qi Yu Wu, babe Rui En, stars of Tong Xin Yuan -- 'Zhou Da Qiu (dunno wat's his real name), Priscillia Chan, Ruan Mian Mian (dunno wat's her real name), Xu Mei Jen, Apple Hong, Xiang Yun, Felicia Chin, Pierre Png, Terrence Cao and Adrain Pang... Wat an eye-ful... *slurp* =)

Ix and Qi Yu Wu are really 2 hunky fellas... Pierre, Adrain and Terrence looks really good in real life... Priscillia Chan and Felicia Chin were gorgeous... Felicia looked really tall... almost as tall as Pierre when she stands next to him, contrary to wat I think when i see her on tv... Hmm... it was a pleasant time meeting them... =)

The cast of Tong Xin Yuan...

Autograph session...

iF OnLy oFFiCe's pAnTrY wErE tHiS gOoD...

2005-10-29T11:17:00.000+08:00

... then everyone would have no complains reporting to work... =)

Get Sudoku-nised... Or be a Goon-Du...

2005-10-28T23:59:00.000+08:00

"Come, come... everybody take one each... go and do and time yourself how long you need to take to finish... I'm looking for the company's IQ 'sheng-tong' (whiz kid)" This was wat my company 2IC said on tuesday...

All of us looked at him with the blank look... *Huh??*

It's actually the Sudoku puzzle... the latest puzzle craze to hit our shores... I've seen it reported on the newspapers, and books on it at the book shop...

So wat's Sudoku??

It means 'number game' in Japanese words, where it began in Japanese puzzle magazines back in 1984 ... It's actually a puzzle made up of 81 squares, a grid line divided into nine blocks, each containing nine squares... It looks like a crossword puzzle, but with numbers in it instead... So you are supposed to fill in the grid to ensure that each of the nine blocks contains the numbers from 1 to 9 within, at the same time ensuring that each column and row contains the numbers 1 to 9 without any repetition... It's appealing to puzzle solvers because even though numbers are used, no knowledge of maths are required... the solver does not need to know the complicated mathematical calculations and formulas to encrypt it, therefore a great game for all ages... Mathematical skills are TRULY NOT required to play the game, just some patience and logic... But why logic? you may ask... It's because you need to deduce wat numbers should be, confirmed, chopped, guaranteed in the particular box, and from there see a pattern to fill in another box, or any other number that may fall in the other boxes... Sounds chim? Not really actually... Juz some nerve-wrecking thinking and hair pulling experience...

(eg: the given numbers are in red, the lighted numbers show that they are the ones to be filled in, and the numbers shown above are correct...)

As you successfully complete one puzzle, it becomes addictive... And it's addictive coz you can play it anywhere, or juz to kill time while travelling... Unlike crosswords puzzles, which you would be stuck if you can't get something, in Sudoku, if you give up, it juz means you simply didn't try hard enough...

So juz how addictive is it?? According to the article on 20th October's issue of 'Today' newspapers, a TV show and a board game are in the pipelines in Britain... when 'The Times' in Britain announces on Friday that it was publishing Sudoku puzzles in their papers the following Monday, it's rival, 'The Daily Mail' called its experts in over the weekend to come up with a puzzle by Monday too... From the two papers, the craze spread through UK and to the rest of the world... Our local shores have yet to be really hit by the storm at least... it has so far been spread through word-of-mouth, and some playing the game online... A recent visit at Popular bookstore surprised me... The popular yellow 'dummy's guide book' had a topic/book on Sudoku... And it's not 1, not 2... but 3!! it's currently at it's third volume!! Looking at the trend, it's going to hit us hard, and soon...

It is so hot that the word, Sudoku, has already been the 2005 word for Britain, where compilers of the Oxford English Dictionary said that the word 'Sudoku' has claimed its place in the English language...

So how do we tackle the game?

There's actually a systematic way to complete the Sudoku puzzle...
- Never use a trial and error method to solve the puzzle... you'll get nowhere and will almost impossibly solve the puzzle... Unless you're damn 'heng'... Sudoku is actually a test of your logic and reasoning abilities... Sudoku is not a 'flip of the coin' game... it's not about probability or luck...

- Pencil in various possibilities in the boxes as you go along, and eliminate those that clearly do not belong there... Y0u do not want to be confused further, when you already are, very confused...

- One of the easiest way to start playing is to start counting and combing the puzzle systematically... Start with the number 1, combing each row and column and a block, finding which boxes do the '1' fit into... Then work your way up from 1 to 9... Or you can try starting with the number that appears most in the puzzle... If it's '8', then start with 8 first, to closer in the boxes to be filled...

- Most Sudoku puzzles can be solved within 15 to 30 minutes... It's ok to be stumped with a particularly hard puzzle, or one that you simply 'par-jiao' and overlooked, after all the mind-boggling numbers... take a break if you need to, or look at other boxes or parts of the puzzle that you've ignored, then come back to tackle the problem area afresh...

- It's juz a game... dun be upset if someone completes the puzzle faster than you do... it doesn't really mean that he has a higher IQ than you... it may be that he has mastered all the tactics to tackle Sudoku, or that he has a sharper eye and mind to spot... Cheer up dude!!

Hope you'll have fun, Sudoku-nising!! =)

*Some of the content are from 20th October 2005 of TODAY's newspapers...

My OuTiNg WiTh BaO bEi...

2005-10-23T13:25:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, we spend and shop like kings and queens, princes and princesses... Literally like 'Shopping king and shopping queen'

First stop: we went to heeren to walk walk... bao bei bought a blue addidas singlet for me... $29.. it's a nice colour and the cutting is nice... then, bao bei hestitated for some time before buying her skirt, from this shop called 'fresh imp...' watever... it's juz a denim skirt, but then the design is quite nice... and it's $49.90...

Then we went to Ngee Ann City to walk walk... they're having a french affair exhibition, which carries brands and products from the romantic country of France... Wat caught our eyes were the french label cars on display... Renault and Peugeot... (scroll down for pics...) went to see the cars for a while... I was surprised that the Renault Megane actually have a very spacious legroom for the rear passengers... And the price is attractively priced at $70,000... I feel that it's a good buy, considering that it's a continental car, which fetches a beter value than the normal japanese car, and also because of it's designs... I will seriously consider it if i'm looking for a car now...

Bao bei remember that 'monster-in-law' wanted to buy her Harley Davidson black polo-tee, so we went to the shop... Looked for her size... And it's amazingly at XXXL size for her!!! Didn't know that the shop's sizing is so small, as it's an american brand... and secondly, didn't know that such a size even exist... I felt a bit pai-seh to ask the sales staff to get the size for me... Coz i went: "Do you have the triple X... L size?" Sounds like triple X... (XXX) haha... And then we paid up... using my safra card to get a 10% discount... didn't know my safra card have such a good bargain... and anyway, it's the first time i'm using it... After discount is about $38...

Went to have our 'milk tea with pudding' at the 'pao pao cha shop, cool passion'... it's one of the best bubble tea shop left in Singapore now... we walked further down to the Giordano shop... I tried on the brown pants that is quite in fashion now... Not too bad, but still not really willing to buy because i dun really wan to spend now... but then i bought a mandarin collar shirt at $33, after discount... Bao bei tried on the brown pants and she looked good in it... Cost $41 after discount...

Then went to Wisma Atria for dinner at the new level 4 food court, called food republic... it's one of the best food court that i've ever gone too... the decor is nice... Designed in a 60s 70s kind of era, serving all the famous hawker food in Singapore... Eg: Thye Hong Hokkien Mee, the famous stall in Singapore that serves with the brown leaf...Chicken rice, with original recipe from the famous Chatterbox, Yu Kee duck rice, Lau Di Fang scissors-cut curry rice, famous from the Maxwell market, Fortunate Restaurant which serves good Hong Kong dim dum... The famous oldies kept playing from the background... Really brings me back to the olden days feeling, set in the modern day setting of comfortable air-con food court environment... I had ban-mian... It looks and taste good... the noodles is so ultra smooth and silky... like kuay teow... this shows that the person whom hand-made the noodles had a good skill and knead for a long time to get this texture... Bao bei was not hungry and she didn't know wat to eat... In the end, we got some dim sum... (see pics below...) *slurp*

Then we went to the Coffee Club to get bao bei's dinner... She had a prata wrap with chicken tikki, which is a little spicy... Vegetable soup and garlic bread, and also a mocha freeze... total cost: $13.40...

After dinner, we went to the Borders at Wheelock Place... Bao bei got a Hillary Duff book for debbie, at a 30% discount because of the coupon that i tore off from newspaper... After disount is about $17...

We then took bus 190 back to Choa Chu Kang... it's a fast ride of only 30 mins... but still have to take a connecting bus or train back to Yew Tee... From Choa Chu Kang, we took bus 307 and stopped near her house... I spent the night at Bao bei's house... Watched a bit of 'The Wedding Planner'... Watched the show with bao bei before at Cineleisure, but we couldn't really remember the show...

Total Expenditure:
Addidas shirt: $29
Skirt: $49
Harley Davidson polo-tee: $38
Bubble tea: $2.70
Giordano shirt: $33
Giordano pants: $41
Food Court: $8.80
Coffee Club: $13
Bordersbooks: $17
Total: $231.50!!!

Enjoy the pictures...

Peugeot 407, comes with the spacewagon edition... Price: $114,950...

The butt view... the body looks 'solid'...

Renault Megane Coupe... Price: $117,888... Did you happen to see that hot chick at the corner? =)

Food Republic... The ceiling-to-ground windows bring in natural light... Notice the 'old' wooden tables and chairs...

My ban-mian... Silky smooth noodles... Ma-ma-mi-ah...

Our dim sum... Siew mai and Har gow...

The sliced-up Har gow...

Prata wrap with chicken tikki...

Bao bei enjoying her vegetable soup with garlic bread...

Mocha freeze...

fOoDie tRiP ~ cArL's Jr

2005-10-22T12:54:00.000+08:00

Last weekend, bao bei and i were at our loose ends... dunno where to go and wat to do... Singapore is so small that people juz keep going to the same place, day in, day out... A typical weekend itineray could be:

Saturday: Orchard Road

Sunday: Marina/Suntec City area

I thot, "this must be the most boring weekend ever..."

So i went to pick bao bei up from work at concourse, still not knowing where to go...

Then suddenly, an idea struck my mind... a la wat you see in the cartoons, having a light bulb appearing... *tink*

"How about going to Carls's Jr at Marina Square... It's nearby, juz take a cab wouldn't cost much..."

So, that's where we went for lunch... I ordered a BBQ charbroiled chicken burger set, which comes with fries and drink... we upsize it for addtional 50 cents to get a medium share, so that bao bei and i can share and cut cost... Bao bei ordered a chicken salad, coz she's not too hungry and she felt like going green and healthy... The portions for the burger and the salad were huge... should be in american size... and it comes in "american size" prices too...

BBQ charbroiled chicken burger set: $9.70

Up size meidum size: $0.50

Chicken salad: $6.80

Total: $17.00

Although the prices are a little high, but i felt it's all worth it... coz it's really hearty filling full for us, and also bao bei loves the place... Anything bao bei loves should be worth it... *wink* The other thing wonderful is that the drinks are self-serve at the drinks station... You can choose your own drinks, from fizzy drinks to lemon tea... Since it's self-serve, i think it should be free-flow, since there's no way to control it... So below are some pics to let you salivate...

*Note: i'm not advertising for Carl's Jr, no advertising/promotional fee was received... i'm juz spreading through word-of-mouth... =)

the BBQ charbroiled chicken burger set...

the HUGE burger... this is the actual size... no camera tricks were done...

bao bei's chicken salad, with thousand island dressing...

A clearer picture of bao bei's chicken salad... still fresh from the refrigerator, filled with moist on the cover...

and the chicken salad, going topless... dressed with thousand island sauce...

Yummy isn't it? Visit Carl's Jr then...

Ratings:

Food: ****

Place: ****

Price: *** half (a little tad high)

BiKiNiS gAlOrE... sLuRp

2005-10-22T00:42:00.000+08:00

I went to bao bei's house during night's off last wednesday... We managed to catch our favourite reality show(other than The Apprentice), The Amazing Race--Family Edition ... It was still as exciting... The show's winning formula of exciting race that brings the teams to different parts of the world, under competing time pressure and road blocks or tasks that they have to do... Best of all, this time round with their kids tagging along, it's getting more interesting... Seeing families tickling one another off, bitching about, the race is getting more and more exciting...

Then it's time to make my way back to the god-forsaken camp of mine... Gave bao bei a goodbye kiss and bear hug, and made my way to the MRT station...

I was travelling up the escalator to the platform when i was kaypoh-ing, looking down at the newspaper/magazine kiosk, getting a birds' eye view of the wide display of magazines... Something caught my eye...

Something blue, like the colour of the blue sky...
A sexy girl, striking a sexy pose...
Something beige, like skin colour, and lots of it...
And the familiar wide sweet smile, angelic pretty face, and a dimple that will make all hearts flutter...
It's JOANNE PEH!!!
Oh my goodness!!! Joanne in bikini!!! Have to buy!!!

It's quite amazing that from that distance that i'd spotted the magazine, easily 2 or 3 storeys high up, i can still recognise my Joanne Peh on the small magazine(from that distance)...

Haha... I quickly call my bao bei to tell her about it... Bao bei noes that i like her... she said that she would get it for me the next day, but she was too busy to do so... So in the end, i got it myself... Something that's cool with bao bei is that not only does she let me look at girls, she would also join in the 'activity'... Whenever we're out on the streets and spot any pretty girls, we would nudge each other, asking each other to see too... Where to find such a girlfriend?? *wink* ; )

So i happily enjoy my magazine, filled with joanne peh in sexy bikinis that challengingly managed to cover strategic spots... I must say she looks good in the photo shoot... Sexy, comfortable, confident, and the million-dollar smile, that comes with her beautiful dimple... (I love dimples, but sadly i dun have...) Although she may not have well-endowed boobs, but she does have a simply perfectly sexy curvacious figure... *slurp*

Below are some photos that i took off the magazine... Enjoy... *burp*

My bao bei will look sexy like her too if she strikes this pose...

Isn't she sweet and sexy??

tis is the bikini that bao bei is eyeing for... wonder how much is it?? $$

You can run... but you cannot hide...

woohoo... hot chick!!

Aww... Sexy lady...

*The above pictures are taken off the 8-days magazine, issue 784, 13th October 2005. They are meant to be for viewing only.

There's been a grave misunderstanding...

2005-10-01T11:18:00.000+08:00

Yes, that was the tagline of the movie, Corpse Bride... I brought my younger brother to Jurong Point to catch the new movie as a present for Children's Day, since I was on half day off... After paying $8 each for the tickets, and $8.50 for the popcorn combo, with comes with a large serving of popcorn, a large drink and a free handphone strap, we made our way to the theatre...

As we were early, there wasn't much crowd in the theatre yet... I walked through the row of seat first, looking for our assigned seats, L05 & L06... Since L06 is nearer to the steps of pathway, I exchanged seats with my brother... We settled down, enjoyed our popcorn combo and the advertisements showing on screen...

A few minutes later, a pair of university undergrad-looking couple (possibly form the nearby NTU) came up to our aisle... The girl was a pretty, hot chick!! She wore a pink top and brown skirt, holding a thick white sweater in one hand... They squeezed through our cramped legroom to get to their seats, L03 & L04... As she walked past me, the aromatic sweet scent of her perfume whisked past my nose... *sniff-sniff* Argh...... Shouldn't have changed seats with my brother!! (I think bao bei will be shaking her head and be fuming mad when she reads this... But hey... I'm just trying to be cheeky only kae, bao bei? =p )

So, continue on with the advertisements... They aired the Visa card advertisement, the one in the safari setting, where, they chanced upon an 'Ah Meng' lying in the middle of the road, playing dead... In the end, the toursit had to use her visa card to call for bananas to get back her luggages... That was one of my favourite advertisements...

Then came the Visa platinum card advertisement, which is also one of my favourites... This is the one where the setting is set in India... The one which my bao bei and I always laugh to, coz we would always try to imitate the little girl and the Indian accent... I particulary enjoyed this one as it's the full extended version... I've never seen the extended version before, and I thought that the one always showing on tv is the actual one... I must say that the full extended version is much nicer, and I lurrve it...

Here's a small part of it... You must say/read it with the Indian accent...

Man to Richard Gere: More birds, more luck!!
******
Girl: My brother is going away on a journey, I want to buy five birds to wish him luck.
Bird-seller: But there's only enough for 1 bird...
Girl: Okay... (With a sad, disappointed tone)

Haha... Bao bei and I would always play to it...

Corpse Bride is about this guy called Victor, whom has been arranged by his family to marry the girl, Victoria, for money... But actually, Victoria's family is also penny-less... They met for the first time to rehearse their wedding vows, and they fell in love at first sight... As Victor is too anxious and keeps forgetting his verse, the rehearsal is called off by the pastor angrily... Victor was disappointed with himself and ran off... On his way, he kept rehearsing, and finally got the right verse...

"With this hand, I'll lift your sorrow...

With this cup, I'll fill your wine...

With this ring, I'll marry you..."

And he went on to put the ring on a tweak, to rehearse, not realising that that was the finger of a corpse bride, and he's actually in a cemetry... Then Emily, the corpse bride, rose from the ground and began chasing her 'husband'... "You shall now kiss your bride..."

So the story goes on, with Emily having found her husband, and Victor, wanting to go back to marry his true love, Victora...

It's a typical Warner Brother's cartoon, where it will come to a happy ending... Along the way, it's filled with creative cartoon happenings, like the ribcage of a skeleton being a guitar, and a skeleton, dropping his jaw to the ground when some jaw-dropping thing happened... On the whole, the plot is simple, fairly interesting, and it's a short film of juz 1 hr 15 mins... Only small kids would really enjoy, I would say...

Story: ***

Creativity: ****

Graphics: *** & half

Overall: ***

MeN aRe FrOm MaRs, WoMeN aRe FrOm VeNuS...

2005-09-23T07:05:00.000+08:00

Got this from my bao bei... Enjoy...... =)

The Bank wishes to inform all its clients that we are installing new "Drive-thru" ATM machines, where you will be able to withdraw money without leaving your vehicle. Please follow the instructions that apply to you:

For our MALE customers:
1. Drive up to the ATM machine
2. Open your car window
3. Insert card into machine and enter PIN
4. Enter amount of cash required
5. Retrieve card, cash and receipt
6. Close window
7. Drive off

For our FEMALE customers:
1. Drive up to ATM machine
2. Reverse back the required amount to align car window with machine
3. Restart stalled engine
4. Open the car window
5. Find handbag, remove all contents on to passenger seat to locate card
6. Turn the radio down
7. Attempt to insert card into machine
8. Open car door to allow easier access to ATM machine, due to its excessive distance from car 9. Insert card
10. After "Invalid card" is displayed, remove the David Jones or Myer card, and insert correct ATM card
11. Remove ATM card
12. Re-insert card right way up
13. Re-enter handbag to find diary with your PIN written on the inside back page
14. Enter PIN
15. Press "cancel" and re-enter correct PIN
16. Enter amount of cash required
17. Check make-up in rearview mirror
18. Retrieve card
19. Empty handbag again to locate card holder and place card inside
20. Place receipt in back of cheque book
21. Re-check make-up
22. Drive forward 2 metres
23. Reverse back to ATM machine
24. Retrieve cash
25. Re-empty handbag, locate purse and place cash inside
26. Restart stalled engine and pull off
27. Drive for 2 to 3 kilometres
28. Release handbrake

Haha... Is our fairer sex really that bad with wheels?? =)

aLoNe In A hOteL......

2005-09-21T07:17:00.000+08:00

Got this through an email from my fren...

I checked into a hotel on a business trip and was a bit lonely so I thought I'd get me one of those girls that you see advertised in phone booths when you are calling for a cab.

I grabbed a card on my way in. It was an ad for a girl calling herself, Erogonique, a lovely girl, bending over in the photo.

She had all the right curves in all the right places, beautiful long wavy hair, long graceful legs that seems to go on forever, you know the kind.

So I'm in my room and figured, "What the hell~!!, I'll give her a call."

"Hello?" the woman says. God~!! She sounded sexy.

"Hi, I hear you give a great massage and I'll like you to come to my room and give me one. No, wait! I should be straight with you. I'm in town all alone, and what I really want is SEX. I want it hard, I want it hot, and I want it now. I'm talking kinky the whole night long. You name it, we'll do it. Bring implements, toys, everything you've got in your bag of tricks. We'll go hot and heavy all night. Tie me up, wear a strap on, cover me in chocolate syrup and whip cream, anything you want, baby~! Now, how does that sound?"

She says, "That sounds fantastic, but for an outside line, you need to press '9'".

Moral of the story: Dun be too anxious to dial the number... Read the instructions on the phone carefully first!!

TiReD Of HoW yOu OrDeR yOUr PiZzA??

2005-09-16T08:50:00.000+08:00

Got this from the talking cock website... www.talkingcock.com Have a good laugh... =)

Sian of just dialing, waiting and paying? Here are some innovative (OK, OK, wu liao) ways of ordering pizza…

1. Ask them if you can keep the box. When they say yes, break into tears and go, “Thank you! Thank you so much! God bless you!” etc.

2. Ask them to make sure your pizza is really dead – not like the last time like that.

3. Ask them to confirm exactly how many dolphins had to be killed in order to make your pizza.

4. When they repeat your order back to you, change it slightly. Do this three or four times.

5. Ask them if they have one inch pizzas.

6. Ask them acherly, hor, how come they measure their pizzas in inches and not centimetres, ha?

7. When they ask, “Will that be all?”, reply angrily: “Why, not satisfied, ah? I order so little so you see me no up, is it? Neh’mine! Steady! Later I call my brother all come to your shop and settle!”

8. Ask what the order taker is wearing, and when he or she answers, go, “Mmmm.”

9. Ask them to arrange the pepperoni in the shape of Hello Kitty.

10. In sign language. Over the phone.

11. Tell the order taker to speak very softly, because the “Men in White” are tapping your line.

12. Ask them to hold on, then shout in a child’s voice, “Mummy, can borrow me fifty loller buy pizza?”

13. Pretend the pizza hotline is the NKF donation line, and ask the pizza guy to do ridiculous and unhealthy stunts before you hand over your money.

The 8 White Elephants that caused a stir...

2005-09-16T08:44:00.000+08:00

Definition: 'White elephant' is a term used to label something that is expensive and useless...

During a ministerial walkabout at a constituency some time last month, 8 cute looking (It's really cute if you've seen them) white elephant placards were placed on a road divider outside Buangkok MRT station... Apparently, some unidentified people had intentionally placed them there, to gain the attention of the MP, to raise their concerns over the ready-made-but-can't-be-used-station... The issue was that the station has been ready-made 2 years ago, but has not been open to public use, as the transport company in control of the station felt that there isn't enough passenger volume to make the station financially viable... Residents living near the station had to alight either 1 stop earlier or after, and walk home, making it inconvenient for them... Who in the right frame of mind would want to go the long way when there is a station so near to them? And worse still, having the non-functioning station stare at you when you're going through the long way... "Enough is enough..." That lead to the residents making some 'noise'......

And they did it in a tongue-in-cheek way... Or at else from how I see it... White elephants, meaning to describe the station, were placed along the divider to gain some attention from the MP... Isn't it a creative way, to show how you feel about the issue? Even the MP himself was amused by it and vowed to give the residents concerned an answer soon... The next day, the Transport Minister himself appeared amused too, and said that he would get the authorities and transport company to make another asessment and an answer would be revealed in a month or two...

But, the cute elephants somehow did not seem to amuse all... The police are acting on a call of complaint with regards to the incident... Investigations were soon carried out and a couple of people were called back for questioning...

On the surface, from what I see, there isn't anything that the 'elephants' could have broken any laws... If there are supposed to be any, it could be that the elephants are in the nude, showing their bon-bon and smiling, cheekily, if you insist so... But what is so wrong about it?? Why must the police be called in to investigate? On something so trivial as to juz gaining attention, in a light-hearted, creative and innovative way... I was amused by how creative the residents were... But I'm even more amused at how the police and relevant authorities reacted...

Moral of the story: Point taken, but along comes many issues...

The million dollar question was: Who's the one whom made the complaint??

Looking at the case, it doesn't take long for us to point the finger at the most suspicious party...

But the transport company was quick to reply: "It wasn't us."

Then who could it be?? Could it be someone from the animal rights group whom were concerned that animals were being harmed in the process of displaying these placards??

Then the reason why the police reacted was because a call of complaint was made, and apparently the person involved in placing the placards did not apply for a permit to display in public... So now the ball is in the court of the police... Would the authorities drop the investigation and charges, if any, on the poor residents being investigated?? The residents were juz trying to raise a concern to the MP, after countless of meetings proved ineffective in solving the station issue... It is juz a creative manner to raise the issue, using creativity... And the other, providing feedback to the government and authorities... Isn't this what we are always asked to do?? Feedback and creativity?? If the relevant people were being charged for these, it would kill all the campaigns that the government had been always rallying us to do... Literally, killing two birds with one stone... So now, the show is up to how the police would respond to this issue...

The transport company argued that the reason why the station remains closed was because there wasn't enough passenger volume around the station to make it financially viable to open the station... I once read an article on The Straits Times Forum Page, where one reader wrote in... "If passenger volume is the reason why the station is closed, why then, is the Marina Bay station, serving only park goers and people to the recreation centre at marina south, open despite low passenger volume?" Secondly, there seems to be an increase in the resident population dwelling around the station, but why is there still a long delay in the opening of the station? Would the relevant authorities please stand up?

Let's juz wait and see what the 'elephants' can do...

A duty that i will miss doing...

2005-09-10T04:23:00.000+08:00

**Note: Information below is meant to be for reading ONLY.**

Waking up on tuesday morning at 11am was shiok... (How many of you guys get to do it like me? Jealous aren't you??) I was thinking: "I've got another beautiful day before booking in tonite, and I can do some blogging..."

Then came the dreaded call...

Officer: "Can you book in at 4pm today, then take over the duty today?"
Me: "Huh? But my eye still red leh?" (Trying to keng with my MC covering until that nite)
Officer: "You go and consider about it first, then let me noe again... Coz if you dun do, then the poor guy will be doing 4 nights straight in a row..."

As I'm still new in the company and dun wan to be 'marked' by them in future, I agreed, knowing that MC is wasted...

Me: "Ok lor... Then I'll book in at 4..."

So there I am, after 6 straight days of staying away from camp... I was so reluctant to go back.. And I was only given like 4 to 5 hours of notice in advance, throwing aside all my beautiful plans for the day... Sucks...

I was tasked to do a Protection of Installation (POI) duty at a particular fuel refinery plant in the west from 6th Sept to 8 Sept... (The name of the plant is kept secret to you so as to protect the plant... It's a national security issue... I'm a man in green you know...)

Upon reaching the plant, I had to start work immediately, at a lost with the environment and what is expected of me to do...

1600 to 1900 hrs:
Got into a Light Patrol Vehicle(LPV) as a vehicle commander... The LPV is a Nissan pick-up, with a machine gun (MG) mounted at the rear of the vehicle... It allows 3 troopers to be seated at the rear when patroling... Apparently, with the dates drawing closer to the anniversary of Sept 11, there is an increase in the security level... An MG has to be set up at the entrance of the plant during peak hours as a show of force... So for the 3 hours straight, I was juz sitting in the vehicle, together with my driver, looking at cars and, if we're lucky, pretty girls leaving home from work...

2200 to 0600 hrs
I was assigned to the graveyard shift for my first patrolling... Actually as a vehicle commander role, it was rather simple... I had to assign my men to take up various positions surronding the perimeter of the plant, then for every 2 hours, use the vehicle to pick them up and change their positions so that they do not get bored... The positions that the troopers had to take up were observation towers, main gates and 1 trooper mounting on the rear of my vehicle... In between the changing of shifts, I will continue to patrol around in the vehicle... And if we're bored and tired, we will drive to the infamous secret hideout and twang* there... Especially during this shift, we wil tend to go there and catch our uncomforatble and often interrupted beauty sleep...
*Twang: To eat snake...

0700 to 0900 hrs
After 8 hours of shift, I thought that I can finally catch my beauty sleep until my next shift at 1400 hrs... But with the current increase in security, we have to set up our MG post again at the entrance... And during the stint, both the driver and I were sleeping in the vehicle, with the air-con on......

0900 to 1400 hrs
It's my sleeping time finally... Managed to sleep for another 3 hours and some lunch before my shift again at 1400 hrs..

1400 to 2200 hrs
Back to my duty again... Picking my troopers up, dropping them at various locations, patrolling around and twang-ing at our favourite spot...

2200 to 0600 hrs
Beauty sleep... ZZzzz...

0600 to 1400 hrs
Back to my duty again... And finally at 1400 hrs, we handed over to the next platoon to take over the duty and head back to camp...

Looking back, it was actually a fun thing to do... Coz it's a new environment out of camp and we seems to be like in the action at all times... If any suspicious people or vehicle is lurking around, we will be comms by the walkie talkie and our vehicle will be mobilised to go check it out... Besides that, the facilities available for rest and recreation were much better than in camp... Air-conditioned sleeping environment for commanders, large area at the multi-purpose hall as bunks for the troopers, Starbucks chairs and tables for meal times, refrigerator, hot-water flask for cup noodles, 2 29 inch tv with sofa set, dvd players and X-box game sets, and good ration food from SAFTI cookhouse, which serves meals for the officer cadets... The nightsnack provided were heavenly... Chicken pie and never ending flow of cup noodles... Since when were nightsnacks so delicious, compared to the sponge cakes or peanut butter sandwiches that we normally had back in camp? Once having meals, I overheard one fellow saying: "If Gedong (Sungei Gedong) food were as nice..."

I was a bit sad to leave the place, leaving behind my newly made friend - my driver, with whom I talked cock and twang with... I gave him a good handshake, wished him well and bade goodbye to him... Goodbye to my refinery plant too...

A dAtE WiTh DeNiSe KeLLeR......

2005-09-04T06:00:00.000+08:00

No lah... It's not going to happen... That was juz an eye catcher for you to come read this entry... *Cheapskate...*

Bao bei and I were at cineleisure to watch 'Bewitched' when we saw her hosting an outdoor event with MTV and Acuvue, the contact lens company... We took a photo with her and bao bei was so excited about it that she can't settle down until for quite some time... So here are some shots that I'll share with you...

So that's me, denise and bao bei...

Where's Howard??

And where's Wolfgang??

Isn't she prettier with dark-coloured hair... Like what we saw on 'Eye for a Guy 2' This picture is taken off the MTV website...

hOt cHiCk!!

2005-09-03T13:33:00.000+08:00

After much talk about my bao bei, it's time to bring her out to show you... But before you see the picture, please read the lines below first...

**Warning!! Person seen on picture may not match with the actual person you see in real life!!! Because the actual person is prettier, sexier and hotter!!! Please refrain from touching screen as the hot temperature may burn you... Especially all the chee ko peks out there whom are tempting to do so... If you really can't resist, do it at your own risk!!! You may wan to prepare some tissue paper by your side in case you decide to drool... You are reminded that picture is only for viewing, and NOT to be reproduced in any other way watsoever as picture is subjected to copyright acts and patented trademarks... You do not wan to risk getting yourself in jail for piracy acts, do you??**

Tis is my bao bei... Isn't she HoT??

That's us at Crystal Jade enjoying our icy cold soya bean... Isn't she cute?? hOt cHiCk!!!

Red Eye...

2005-09-03T08:05:00.000+08:00

I'm not refering to the thriller 'Red Eye' currently showing at the cinemas, but the red sore eyes that i'm suffering now... It's actually sore eye, without the 's' that began with my left eye... But i think has now passed on to infect my right eye too, showing visible signs of redness...

I've got this disease from my bunk mate in camp... He booked in on monday nite with both eyes sore... terribly red and sore... He said he would go see the MO (Medical Officer, a doctor in the army language), the following day... He was given medical leave subsequently and went home... Sleeping on the bed to his left, I thought that I was safe and healthy enough to not have caught the disease immediately... But on wednesday night, my left eye began to produce lots of 'eye shit' and my left eye vision began to get blur because of that... A check with my fellow bunk mate, which slept on the bed next to my left, said that that was the inital symptoms... Both his eyes were red and swollen, and he had the symptoms as i did earlier in the day... That's it!!! I soon began to realise I had got infected, as my eyes began to produce more eye shit and became red around the retina... I had difficulty getting a good nite sleep that nite... woke up a few times to wipe off the fluids that kept flowing from my eye... The next morning, I had difficulty opening up my left eye, as the fluid that had flowed out from my eye hardened and cause my eyelids to be glue-ed together... And my eye was sore with redness and painful to keep it open...

I went to the medical centre in camp to see the MO... Waited for 45 minutes for the consultaion and 2 hours 15 mins for the medication and medical slip... Can you imagine the pain and emotional torture that I went through? Waiting in pain and wasting time for me to get healed?? The medication prescribed was not what I wanted to wait for... It was the medical slip... The medical slip that enables me to have medical leave and book out of camp, to get better treatment and medicine from my own family doctor... A check with the medic there said that the doctors had gone for a meeting, therefore there was no one to sign the medical slip... Then why would the doctors want to hold a meeting during the morning peak hours when the medical centre had juz opened and flooded with patients? It caused a jam in the service, letting us patients wait in pain when when we are already suffering from some illness... It juz shows how inefficient they are...

I finally reached home at noon, and went to see my family doctor in the afternoon... I didn't bring the medicine that the MO had prescribed, coz I noe I wouldn't take it anyway... Reason being is because the medicines that they prescribed are generally milder, and would take a longer time to recover... My friendly family doctor looked at my eye and says it's quite sore, and continued to ask me what had the MO prescribed... I told him he gave me 2 bottles of eye drops, one called sodium chloride and the other i'm not sure... He then drew an eye drop bottle shape and asked me is it something like this and i said yes...

And then he said, "I hope he didn't give you this", pointing to a blue and white box on his table...

I took a closer look and see what medicine he was refering to......... It was the box that contain the 'blue pill'... The box says... 'Viagra'.........

I quickly said: "NO, no... Definitely not this!!!" I didn't noe my doctor can be so cheeky and humourous...

The MO couldn't have prescribed the viagra, as it was not a place to consume the medicine, what with an almost 100% male population in camp... Why would we need it for?? Not unless for some underground indecent activity between 2 sexually deprived and sexually unachieveable males... Secondly, my bao bei would tell you that I definitely dun need that at the moment, and for some 20 to 30 years in time, as i can still live up to the occassion...

So here I am, confined and isolated in my room, typing this entry... I juz hope that I will recover fast and thus able to go watch a movie with my bao bei this weekend... I miss you bao bei...

The school of the future...

2005-08-27T10:33:00.000+08:00

Having been in the army for so long, I found that there are actually a lot of similiarites between an army camp and a school... Both has to do with passing on knowledge and strict discipline in an organisation... This could be the new kind of schools in the future...

Hierarchy level:

First off, a primary school will have 6 levels of education and hierarchy system... The students will be classified accordingly to these levels...

Pri 1 students will be known as 'recruits' (REC)
Pri 2 will be 'Private' (PTE)
Pri 3 & 4 will be 'Lance Corporal' (LCP)
Pri 5 & 6 will be known as 'Corporal' (CPL)

Once the students have reached Pri 3 level, the well-behaved students will be selected to become prefects... They are known as the Sergeants (SGT)... They will be in-charge of booking students whom mis-behave... Other than that, they have another important role too... They will be stationed at the cookhouse/canteen during mealtimes to ensure that the students do not run about and move in an orderly manner... On most occassions, this role seems redundant as the prefects are juz standing there and staring into the air... But it is important... juz like how a security guard standing at any entry or exit point to 'show face'...

Higher up in the hierarchy comes the form teachers, also known as the 'Platoon Sergeants' (PL Sgt)... They are in-charge of their own particular classs' welfare and well-being... He will act as the fatherly role, while the students will be the kids... The students can refer back any questions or feedback to him, but wil first have to endure any wild vulgarity that will be showered at him... He wil be blessed after that...

Above the Platoons sergeants will be the 'Company Sergeant Major' (CSM) He is the Head of Department for each subject...

Next in line is the 'Regimental Sergeant Major' (RSM)... As the name suggest, he is in charge of disciplinary issues... Any disciplinary cases reported to him will be served with at least 3 extras to the offender... Extras here refers to extra duties or detention... They will be confined over the weekends to do cleaning work to the school... 3 extras means 3 saturdays or sundays will be burnt... This is something that is terribly avoided by people as weekends are precious...

Top in the ranks will be the 'Commanding Officer" (CO)... He is the principal of the school and is most of the time found in the office... He is in-charge of planning the training schedule... and commands a pay of at least $5 to $6k..

In each class, the will be a class monitor, known as Platoon IC... He will have to report the strength of the class before the start of every lesson... Whenever any PL SGT steps into the class, he will go:

"Class DIAM!! (Attention!!)"

"Good Morning/Afternoon Sgt Lim... Platoon IC reporting Strength..."

"Total strength 35, current strength 34... One man 'Attend C' (On MC)... PTE Chao Keng Kia"

"Permision to carry on sergeant?"

Permission is then granted to carry on, and the class will since start...

Curriculum:

The curriculum of the school is very much 50% theory, 50% practical... Students are taught on survival skills, such as to hunt animals for food and to make a fire, to home-making skills such as to build tentages, together with decorating their homes with natural plantation such as plants and scrubs so as to blend in with the environment, otherwise known as 'camoflauging'... Students will have to pass their theory test first, affectionally known as the technical handling test, before they can start on their practical lessons... Practical lessons are normally conducted outfield, so as to make the learning environment as close to nature and as realistic as possible... But before the students set out to field, they are always reminded to put on sun-block lotion, in the colour of green and black... Failure to do so, or to apply properly will be dealt with by having more sun-block lotion applied onto them... This is to ensure that they do not suffer from any adverse effects of staying under the sun for long hours...

Physical Activity:

All work and no play makes Adam a dull boy... To instill a healthy lifestyle, physical lessons are conducted everyday... They range from daily morning basic exercises before their lessons starts to runs in the evening... Basic exercises are 20 push-ups, 20 crunches, 20 star-jumps, 20 alternate leg-thrusts and 20 sit-and-reach stretches... Runs will normally begin with 3kms up to 8 kms, averaging 5 mins per km... Failing to reach end point before time limit will be served extra PT training such as running around the parade square a few more rounds...

An Individual Physical Proficiency Test (IPPT) will be conducted every year to see their fitness level... This is similar to the NAPFA test conducted in other schools but without the sit-and-reach station... The test results will be classified into 4 ranges... Fail, Pass, Silver and Gold... All other awards except gold holders, will have to re-take the test again and again until the gold si obtained...

Another test called Standard Obstalce Course (SOC) is also conducted annually... This is a more gruelling test compared to the above... It starts off will a 700m run, followed by 11 obstacles and finishing off with a 600m run... To pass the test will require students to come in with a finishing timing of 9mins 30 secs... The 11 obstacles are:

Low wall: students are to jump and lunge themselves over a 2m high wall...
Parallel bar: Students are to use their arm power to support themselves and manoveur across the bar...
Horizontal beam: This is a horizontal piece of log... students will have to step and jump across a horizontal log... They have to try to jump further off as the log is laid with barbed wire on the other side... You dun wan to risk getting your buttocks poked, do you?
Swing trainer: Also known as the monkey bar... Needless to explain...
Low rope: Students will have to climb up to the rope to reach the top... looks similar to the fire-fighters vertical bar which they slide down... But this goes in the other direction-- Up, and it is a rope...
Horizontal log: Students will have to leap over this horizontal log, one left hand holding onto the log and using the right leg to leap over...
Balancing beam: Students will have to balance themselves as they walked through a wooden plank held on the two ends...
Zig-Zag: It's a 2m high zig-zag obstacle of wooden planks... students will have to walk up the steps to reach the obstacle, walk through the zig-zags and jump off... students will have to battle with their fear of height at this stage...
Window gate: Students will flip over themselves through this obstacle... they will bend themselves over the bar and flip over... Juz imagine...
Jacob's Ladder: Students will have to climb up this triangular obstacle laid with logs, and walking down on the other side... It can be pretty scary for the first few tries and people with a phobia of heights...
High ramp: Students will run up a ramp off about 2.5 metres high and jump off... when they leap off their feet, they will have to shout their school's name "Sadist!!" At this point, many knees or ankles will be injured if they do not land properly... After this last obstacle, they will have to remind themselves that it's not the end and there's another 600m to the end point...

Upon reaching the end point, you will breathe and pant like you never heard yourself gasping for air before... Your muscles are so tired that you feel like your bladder muscles can't seem to hold onto anything and you feel like you can leak anytime... that's SOC for you... FOC (Free-of-Charge) with our curriculum...

Disciplinary issues:

To get from point to point, the students will have to queue in rows or 3... Instead of putting their hands on the person in front when moving from point to point like a 'too-too-train', they will march...

Whenever the class is too noisy, they will be put to a test of their limbs... Not in the case of standing up, but laying on their fours in a push-up position... Whenever instructions are not carried out quickly, they can be seen in this position too...

End of the day:

At the end of each school day, the whole school will form up at the parade square... The sergeant on duty will have to lower the flag... An instruction order will be read out, called a "Routine Order'...

School of Sadist

(Formerly known as Institiue of Mental Hell)

Routine Order by Commanding Officer

Mr Chin Bian Tai

26 August 2005

Assembly: 0730 hours

First lesson: 0800 hours

Canteen break: 1000 hours

Lunch: 1200 hours

Canteen break: 1500 hours

Last parade: 1830 hours

Students are reminded to have a good hair-cut by next monday... Failure to do so will be disciplinary dealt with...
Students are once again reminded to march from point to point... Failure to do so will be seriously dealt with...
Running around during canteen breaks are STRICTLY prohibited... Offenders will be seriously dealt with...

Safety Message of the day: Students are reminded to drink at least half a water bottle every hour, after meals and before any streneous exercices...

Quote of the day: The greatest oak tree was once a little nut on the ground -- annoynomous...

**End of Routine Order**

This will be followed by the lowering of the National and school flag, together with the National Antemn... After which, the school is dismissed, by having the stidents march out of the gates... And remember... they have to march out and not run, even though they have seen their parents waiting anxiously outside the gates for them...

And now, it's the time of the year again... The school is recruiting for next year's school cohort... Calling out all parents whom wanna send their kids to our school to register by October... There's no distance restrictions (Eg: 2km radius within school)... Right now, we're having a promotion... Free school bus rides and textbooks will be given to the first 100 kids, on a first-come-first-served basis... While stocks last... So hurry!!!

Please join us and together, we're pave your kids pathway to success!!!

CROUCHING TIGER... hidden dragon...

2005-08-23T06:00:00.000+08:00

I've always thought that films by great directors like Ang Lee or Zhang Yimou were 'chim' and had confusing plots, leaving you at the end of the show thinking: "What the heck happened???" But these 2 shows realy blew me off...

"Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" was a show directed by Ang Lee, one of the great legendary chinese directors that made it to Hollywood... It had great actors and actresses in it, with big names like Chow Yun-Fat, Michelle Yeoh and the rising star, Zhang ZiYi... ZiYi played a demure lady set to be married in a loveless marriage... But behind the demure side is a rebelious lady that wants to break out of her monotonous life... She stole Chow's sword and the two swordsmen began hunting her down... It was a film of wits, with them both parties trying to outwit each other, leaving me sitting by the edge of the seat, seeing them coming out with stunts after another... There are some twists in the show, leaving you to think... "Ehh... Why like that??" and "Wow... so you actually knew what happened and kept it all to youself..." There's actually more action to this show, which i had only juz briefly described as I'd watched it almost 2 weeks ago...

The show really lived up to its name, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon... I strongly encourage you to watch this show, which i totally enjoyed... Apart from the story line, there's also something to look out for... The up and rising beauty Zhang ZiYi... She not only is talented with her acting, but is also a true beauty... Not surprising that she will be appearing on the wardrobe poster girl of many guys... *drooling...*

Verdict: 4.5 out of 5 Popcorns

"House Of Flying Daggers", directed by Zhang Yimou, casting Andy Lau, Zhang ZiYi, Takeshi Kaneshiro, or better known as 'Jin Chen Wu'... It was a great story of good hunting the evil... But are the good really good? And the evil really evil?

Andy and Jin are two captains tasked to capture the leader of a underground alliance... Andy got Jin to check out the new dancer of an entertainment pavilion, whom is blind, noting that she could be the daughter of the alliance's leader, whom the local authorities had killed... They captured her and brought her back, drilling her for the alliances' whereabouts, but she refuses to divulge... Both of them then had another plan... Jin would rescue her and escort her to the safety of her allaince, thus bringing the authorities to their hideout... Along the way, both felled in love amid dangers of the authorities coming after their lives after they had escaped from jail...

Then came the amazing twist... The madam at the pavilion is actually of a high ranking of the alliance, ZiYi is not blind, and best of all, Andy is in cahoots with the alliances... ("Ehh... Huh???") They actually using Jin as a bait... Andy actually had a thing for Ziyi, before he was sent for 3 years to be a spy in the authorities... ZiYi was tasked to kill Jin, which she couldn't bear and let him off... But not before a rendezvous sex scene in the woods... (It's actually a great place out in the great outdoors looking at the scenery in the show... *slurppp*) Andy then got jealous and killed her out of jealousy... The two swords hero then fought against each other...

It was a great show with a great story line of love, jealousy, witty plot and strategies, great scenery and cinematography... It was truly a great show to be watched, and i urge you to catch... Not forgetting the screen darling, Zhang ZiYi in this show... I guess she will be my next screen darling after Joanne Peh... =)

Verdict: 5 Popcorns...

NEWater visit

2005-08-11T08:36:00.000+08:00

The last excursion that i had was when i was in Secondary four... Excursions were the usual thing after the exams, when school curriculum work is out and we had lots of time... I was always looking forward to excursions as i'll get to travel out of school, out of gates (similar to today), and go gai gai... So, going to the NEWater plant at Bedok this afternoon reminds me of the good old days, when i was still wearing silly uniforms of matching colours and white canvas shoes, coated with brown stains here and there...

The NEWater plant is located between the Tanah Merah Station and Expo... It's a long deep drive from the main road, thus it was of much consolation when we realise that there was a shuttle service to fetch us out later... The Visitors' Centre is a beautiful piece of architecture... Glass panelled building with a wavy roof top. The interior reminds me of the Singapore Discovery Centre with the high-tech infrastructuresuch as plasma tv screens and 3D guide speaking off the screen...

Some facts that I've learnt today...

Water takes up 70% of the world... And of these, only 3% is portable water... (WHATT??)
Singapore uses 1.36 million cubic centimetres of water every day, enough to fill up 600 olympic swimming pools... (Sounds amazing...)
Singapore has 4 national taps, so they called it...

a) Water from water catchment areas

b) Water from Johor Bahru (Our abang country)

c) Water from the NEWater factories

d) And lastly, water from desalination plants...

4. NEWater is a process of recovering used water, recycling it and reusing it... Up to 90% of recovered water comes from household sewage... (Up to your imagination to think exactly which sewage pipe...) And the remainder will come from used industrial water...

5. These water will be piped to the plant, where it will first goes through filtration(in lay mans term)... Most of the particles will be removed at this stage as the filtration only allows 1/100 the size of our strand of hair of water molecules to go through... Next, it will go through reverse osmosis... At this stage, all bacteria will be removed as the water goes through even finer means of filtration... at the end of this process, water is considered safe to drink... However, Sinagporeans being Singaporeans, where kiasu-ism is always at work, these water will go through ultaviolet light rays to heat up and kill all bacteria, to make sure that water is really really clean... NEWater is thus produced after these stages...

6. After all these hard work, only 2% is pumped into our portable drinking system, where it will be released and mixed together with the water in our water catchment areas... The remainder goes into industrial use... You may wonder, WHY??? Well, it comes down to this mindset that people will have...

"What makes it so sure that the water is really fit for consumption?"

To ease off on people's concerns, the Singapore Government thus take a gentle step... By releasing small amounts of NEWater into our drinking water, gradually increasing the ratio as we get more open to the idea...

If it's fit for consumption, then why is it only 2% of the processed water goes into our portable pipelines, while the reaminder goes to industrial usage?

This is because the industries would require superbly clean water to produce wafers (not the eating kind...) in our electrical components that our Singapore economy depends heavily on...

For people whom have tried NEWater, you will always have this question...

"Why does the water tastes so funny, so wierd?"

The answer is because the water is so terrifically clean that it contains no minerals!!! Thus it tastes bland...

Now, the third question is... "If the water has no minerals, is it safe/healthy to drink?"

That is the reason why the Singapore Government only releases a small percentage to the portable water system, to mix it with the normal conventional water... There has been no exact answer to this question, as there have been 2 different groups of scientist, having different views on the issue... One saying it's alrite to drink mineral free water while the other says otherwise... But, come to think of it... Although you're drinking mineral free water, your mineral intake can come from the food that you eat... So, your body will still have other alternatives to seek the required minerals...

So the next time you pop open your NEWater bottle to drink, remind yourself that the bland taste is due to the taste of mineral free water, and not what your wild imagination would allow you to think... (juz to name a few... pee, human waste, household washing liquid, shower foam etc...)

Cheers!!!

My Maiden blog...

2005-08-06T15:09:00.000+08:00

Hello to all my frens and whoever may be reading this... This is my maiden blog posting... I wonder should I be proud or otherwise to say this, coz the blogging sensation has already begun donkey years ago and here i am, typing out my first entry... I've been reading the papers recently, following up on the blogging scene... And i must say it's fairly interesting to be able to add my 2 cents worth to day-to-day issues, hence the name of my blog... (such a no-brainer...) There are actually many reasons for me to create a blog, and are as follows...

To catch up with what everyone else is doing who are living on planet earth...
To be able to communicate with my frens and my girlfriend(bao bei)
To comment on day-to-day issues, adding my two cents worth and taking a chance to poke fun at things happening everyday... therefore, look out for crazy hilarious postings... haha...
And of course, the most primary reason... to improve on my writing skills (do you believe it??? haha...)

I shall thus end here for now... look out for more postings to come... I'm open to any comments that you may have, but that is subjected to the approvability of the author... (*ahem... that's me) And to all my frens... Have me linked up to you as a link too.... (Pur-lease???) *desperate cry...

All In A Day's Life...

TiT fOr TaT...

A fAiRy TaLe LiFe...

a PeRfEcT dAy...

CiViL sErViCe PaY iNCrEaSe...

mY nAmE iS...... bErT???

tHe EnD oF tHe CrAzY hOrSe...

a PoInT tO pOnDeR uPoN...

tHe PrEcIoUs GeM ~ jAdE

oF cOlOuReD tIcKeTs...

cHaSiNg CaRs...

a ChAnCeD eNcOuNtEr 2...

pLeAsAnT mOrNiNg SuRpRiSe...

a CoZy WeEkEnD...

bRaNd NeW yEaR!!!

mY cHrIsTmAs PrEsEnTs...

i CaN('t) SuRvIvE...

2 hOt Cs...

oF cOkE & mEnToS

tHeIr FiRsT tImE...

oPaH lEaF hOkKiEn MeE...

A cHaNcEd EnCoUnTeR...

wHeRe Am I?

pLeAsE mAkE uP mY rOoM...

wHeN a WoMaN lOvEs A mAn...

hOmE cOoKeD fOoD...

hApPy BiRtHdAy DaDdY!!!

a ReMaRkAbLe LaDy...

yEs, I'm PeTtY... sO wHaT?!?

pLuTo Is OuT...

cOnDoMs NoT aLLoWeD iN sChOoL... (of course...)

sO wHeRe ThE bLoOdY hEll ArE yOu?

tO fLy Or NoT tO fLy?

wOmEn...

mY eNcOuNtEr WiTh A wIsE oLd MaN...

oF cArS & sPiZzA

HoW dO yOu HoLd On To SoMeOnE yOu'Ve NeVeR mEt?

mAnGo MoUsSe

hUge UrGe...

tHE mIcKeY mOuSe ShOp...

~iT's My McDoNaLd'S...~

TuR kWa In My SaTaY bEe HoOn!!!

wOrKiNg ToO haRd???

a BiG tHaNk YoU...

aN eVeNtFuL dAy...

lAzY wEeKeNd...

MiSs SiNgApOrE uNiVeRsE

FiNgEr LiCkInG gOoD... *slurp*

lOOk WhO's TaLkInG nOw!!

mEaN wAt YoU sAy, SaY wAt YoU mEaN...

GeNtLeMeN, sTaRt YoUr EnGiNes... VrOoM vRoOm...

iT's A sMaLL wOrLd AfTeR aLL...

tHe nYp sEx ViDeO...

BaObEi'S 21st BiRtHdAy...

VaLeNtInE's DaY pArT 2...

VaLeNtInE's DaY...

iF i KiSsEd YoU...

2 oLd MaN...

**RiNg~RiNg**

tHe GoOd DaYs...

ChArAdEs ~ BaNg-CoCk??

*JuSt LiKe HeAvEn...*

eNeMy oF tHe sTaTe...

tHe wOrLd oF MaRkEtiNg...

PuT tHe LiMe In ThE cOkE......

LiFeLiNe...

tHe SuBaRu ChAlleNgE 2o05...

tHe SuBaRu cHaLLeNgE... "VvRRooomm, VvRRooomm..."

gLuTToN's BaY @ eSpLaNadE

**StAr iDoL**

iF OnLy oFFiCe's pAnTrY wErE tHiS gOoD...

Get Sudoku-nised... Or be a Goon-Du...

My OuTiNg WiTh BaO bEi...

fOoDie tRiP ~ cArL's Jr

BiKiNiS gAlOrE... *sLuRp*

There's been a grave misunderstanding...

MeN aRe FrOm MaRs, WoMeN aRe FrOm VeNuS...

aLoNe In A hOteL......

TiReD Of HoW yOu OrDeR yOUr PiZzA??

The 8 White Elephants that caused a stir...

FiNgEr LiCkInG gOoD... slurp

RiNg~RiNg

JuSt LiKe HeAvEn...

StAr iDoL

BiKiNiS gAlOrE... sLuRp